Day 59! Asking Why Am I Feeling This Way is a Waste of Time!

Hear how I am learning to ask better questions to get out of moods where I am asking “Why am I feeling this way” or “What made me feel like this” or “Who did what that caused me to be like this?” Being depressed, angry, annoyed, resentful, frustrated, anxious, afraid, fearful, condemning, judgmental, and any other toxic bad mood usually includes my mind asking questions which SEEM to be asked in an effort to fix the bad mood but really they work to KEEP IT IN PLACE. For example, today I was feeling and thinking along with many of the words I just listed and my mind was acting helpful by trying to identify the source of the problem. With most problems in life, this is a helpful approach. Today as I was designing merchandise on Cafepress, I asked “Why is this website SO SLOW” and the answer “I do not know but maybe I should look for a different website to use” encouraged me to search for alternatives. Our minds are setup to solve simple problems very effectively like this by asking questions and seeking answers. The problem is that when the mind itself IS THE PROBLEM, the questions it asks simply reinforce the problem rather than fixing it. In a state of depression, the problem exists only in my mind. As I learn to ask better questions out of the mind, I gain the power to help the mind fix itself. Asking questions like “Why am I feeling this way” actually produces answers that then make reasons for the original problem to existing. What is the original problem? The original problem as I see it is the mind becoming separated from the whole and trying to work on its own without reference to its position of service in the collective. Separation produces a feeling of being alone with the follow up being fear. To solve this problem, the mind starts asking why this happened but then only reinforces the original condition by finding reasons that the now negative state is there. I am not able to remember a time when my mind asked “Why am I feeling like this” and it actually got back an answer of “because you are alone and scared operating on your own willpower without the support of the whole.” An answer like that would motivate an immediate return to prayer and the end of the problem. Instead, answers come back like “Well this person did this” or “This awful event happened” or “because this is wrong” or one of a million more answers that then actually make whatever the original feeling was even bigger. What starts as a moment of disconnection or annoyance quickly turns into full blown anger, resentment, frustration, depression, or any other feeling I do not like even with just one or two answers to an ineffective question. Today my exercise is to notice when my mind asks an ineffective question and to instead ask a more effective question in its place instead of searching for the answer to the ineffective question. This strategy is how I am able generally to avoid having a slight discomfort turn into a full blown problem and I am grateful for the chance to learn this with you today! Thank you for reading this and I hope you enjoy this episode of Happier People podcast!