Amanda Chatel

Hola Barcelona y welcome to English Radio Barcelona Blue. I'm La Marina Cat 102.5 FM. I'm Virgil, still and always. We often talk about sexuality as though it's simply about sex. But the more we really understand human sexuality, the more we realize that it's about something much bigger. How we see ourselves, how we understand our bodies and desires, how we connect with other people and sometimes find our way back to ourselves. This week on English Radio Barcelona Blue Voices, we're looking at humanity and sexuality with Amanda Chattel, a writer, expert in sex and relationships and sexual educator. Welcome to the show, Amanda. Thank you so much for having me Virgil. Well I think it's going to be a fun show, I can see it already. Yeah, I think we're going to have a lot of fun. Talking about things that, you know, two of the things I like best, women and sex. Same. Very good. Well a few years ago, Amanda, it was quoted that you said that... Writing about sex and female sexuality has made you a better woman and a more empathetic person because, in your words, you realize how complicated human sexuality is. You have a greater appreciation of humanity as a whole. And I think that's a fascinating place to begin our conversation. After more than 20 years of writing about sex, relationships, and women's sexuality, what have you learned about women and about ourselves who didn't understand when you first started doing this? I have learned that humans are sexual beings. Although I grew up in a very open-minded household where we talked about everything. Both my parents are very progressive and they're very liberal. Personally, I always got a little squeamish when I had sexual thoughts or sexual fantasies. And then when I got into high school and my friends started having sex before me, I was always blushing. I remember breaking out in sweats. I'm just like, this is so uncomfortable. And when I started writing about it... realized this is the one thing we all have in common like we don't need sex to live but it does make our lives better when we have an orgasm oxytocin is released and it's great for our immune system and it's great for our mental health and I started seeing people, my mother included, as like a sexual person. Like you don't usually look at your mother as a sexual person, so I've given her vibrators and stuff. And the first time she was like, why, why is this happening to me? But I also learned that sex is an umbrella term for so many different things because sex... People view sex differently and how they experience sex from person to person is very different. Sexual pleasure is actually quite personal. So that's what really opened my mind. And I also realized there's a lot of vulnerabilities in there. And it's just... I don't know, I feel like it's a very interesting route that I ended up taking. I think it's great. I mean, you've written about the idea that we don't really lose ourselves. We just sometimes temporarily misplace pieces of ourselves. Now, is sexuality one of those pieces that women lose touch with, perhaps because of shame, relationships, social expectations, or simply not having the opportunity to explore what they actually want? Unfortunately, we live in a culture that frowns upon women who embrace their sexuality. If we took a man and myself and...