He Keeps Trying to Fix Me | Relationship 911
  • 23/10/2020
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He Keeps Trying to Fix Me | Relationship 911

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Descripción de He Keeps Trying to Fix Me | Relationship 911

In today's Episode we answer one of our viewer's questions:
“My Boyfriend is always trying to fix all my problems and I don’t want him to. What do I do?”
In this Episode,  Relationship Experts Jan and Monika advise viewer Heather on her frustration with her boyfriend who is always trying to “Fix” her.
Key Takeaways:
[0:30] Is there a way that you can hear that everytime he gives you advice that all he is trying to do is love you?  Try to imagine that every time he tries to help or fix you that he is saying “I love you!” 
[1:32] If you are sensitive to criticism and take it personally every time someone tries to help or ‘fix’ you, it’s likely that when you were growing up you were used to hearing a similar voice from your parents or loved ones. They may have always been trying to tell you how to live your life or control you. So pay attention to the fact that you are listening from a certain lens, and try to realize that all he is trying to do is love you. 
[2:20 ] Let him know how you are feeling. Tell him that when he is always trying to fix things for you that you appreciate it, but that it’s not what you’re asking for.  Then go ahead and let him know what it is you are asking for.  It’s likely that you just want to be heard, understood or comforted--so try to explain this to him. 
[3:25] It’s also important to look at assumptions. We don’t want to make assumptions that people are broken.  Just because someone presented you with a problem they are having, doesn't mean they want help fixing it.  They may just want to be heard and feel understood. Take it as a compliment that they thought you were a safe space to share this and try to respond as a mirror and with empathy.

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