Attuned

Who Cares - two simple words that are the antidote to your fear of being too much. Should I really have posted about that multiple times?  Should I really have worn that crazy outfit?  Should I really have sent that text? WHO CARES.  I discovered this about a month ago and started saying it to my friends whenever I caught them in a doubt spiral, but it took me a minute to fully embody it for myself. In this episode I break down why it's such an essential reframe for a lot of us who have a deep seated fear of being too much. I share my process of leaning into this mentality, why and how it works, and an (embarrassing) story from my childhood that I realize now was the beginning of shrinking myself away from the spotlight.  No one super successful, with big main character energy got to where they are by playing it safe or doing and being less. So when it comes to your creativity - do the most. Be extra. You have nothing to lose, literally who tf cares!!! x, A Links: Listen to Paradox! Celebrity Energy The Crime of Outshining Others

I have always been notoriously bad at protecting my energy. I’ve lived most of my life as a people pleaser so in the past I’ve given away my time and energy like it’s nothing. But the older I get the more it hits me that time is finite and energy is sacred. We have a limited amount, so we need to protect it.  This episode is a crash course in how to protect your energy. It’s a break down of the most important things I’ve learned after burning myself out so hard that I had no choice but to learn them. I cover everything from understanding your own limits and how to graciously turn down an invite, to realizing when things are out of your control and not your weight to carry.  This is an episode I will keep coming back to in the future when I need it and I hope it can be that for you too.  x,  A @alexandra.cadiz @attunedpodcast

Anyone who ever achieved anything started somewhere. An idea was born at a kitchen table, a song was played to a room of five people, a first video ever was posted on youtube, a lamp was made out of vase and bowl scraps in a second bedroom (re: Ceramicah). No one knows what the answers are before they start. Starting is how you get the answers, and everyone has to be a beginner before they can be an expert. But I think it's easy for us to forget that because we are constantly comparing our beginning to someone else's middle. Especially those of us who switched career paths or are trying something new/taking something we've always been interested in seriously for the first time in our lives. It's vulnerable and daunting. But the unknown is also exciting, it means anything can happen. In this episode I riff on the idea that everybody starts somewhere, sending a message to myself (and anyone else who needs to hear it) that we really can get over our fears and just do it. x, Alex  @alexandra.cadiz @attunedpodcast

I really believe confidence is a muscle that we can build, and the more we practice it, the more it will grow. A big goal of mine for 2023 is to work on my outward confidence and how I present in the world. I want to be able to walk into a room with my head held high and own the space that I take up. Not be afraid to let people see me and put myself first with ease and grace. I know this is much easier said than done and a lot of us struggle with our confidence on a daily basis, so in this episode I break down five actionable things we can start doing right now to boost our self esteem and the way we present in the world. x, A   @alexandra.cadiz @attunedpodcast

A year ago today Micah and I were in Mérida for our wedding. It was a week long affair with multiple events leading up to the big day and contained some of the most unforgettable moments we've ever have. However, it didn't come without its own set of anxiety and emotions. Anyone who has planned a wedding (especially in a pandemic) knows that it can be a  rollercoaster. For us there were many unexpected twists and turns including rain, multiple injuries, important guests not being able to make it, last minute vendor changes, etc. So much of wedding culture in media and movies tells you that your wedding is supposed to be the most perfect, amazing, happiest day of your life. But the reality is, planning such  an intimate and significant event can be extremely vulnerable. It's so much pressure mixed with very high expectations and a shit ton of logistics. I put off making this episode for a while but ultimately thought it was important to share because not enough people talk about this. There were so many moments when I felt crazy and wished I could hear someone else's story to make me feel less alone. So this episode is for anyone who is currently going through the wedding planning process and feeling it too. Please know that you're not alone, and while your wedding should be (and will be!) so amazing and joyful, don't deny any other feelings you have around it too. They are just as valid, completely normal, and in the end it will all be part of the story. x , A Our Vendors Venue: Private Haciendas Planning: Nicoella Events Photography: Marissa Alves Dress: Roxanna Moix Flowers: Floweriize Rentals: Archive Rentals Catering: Apoala View our Photos here. @alexandra.cadiz @attunedpodcast

A year ago today Micah and I were in Mérida for our wedding. It was a week long affair with multiple events leading up to the big day and contained some of the most unforgettable moments we've ever have. However, it didn't come without its own set of anxiety and emotions. Anyone who has planned a wedding (especially in a pandemic) knows that it can be a  rollercoaster. For us there were many unexpected twists and turns including rain, multiple injuries, important guests not being able to make it, last minute vendor changes, etc. So much of wedding culture in media and movies tells you that your wedding is supposed to be the most perfect, amazing, happiest day of your life. But the reality is, planning such  an intimate and significant event can be extremely vulnerable. It's so much pressure mixed with very high expectations and a shit ton of logistics. I put off making this episode for a while but ultimately thought it was important to share because not enough people talk about this. There were so many moments when I felt crazy and wished I could hear someone else's story to make me feel less alone. So this episode is for anyone who is currently going through the wedding planning process and feeling it too. Please know that you're not alone, and while your wedding should be (and will be!) so amazing and joyful, don't deny any other feelings you have around it too. They are just as valid, completely normal, and in the end it will all be part of the story.  x , A   Our Vendors Venue: Private Haciendas Planning: Nicoella Events Photography: Marissa Alves Dress: Roxanna Moix Flowers: Floweriize Rentals: Archive Rentals Catering: Apoala View our Photos here. @alexandra.cadiz @attunedpodcast

Happy Lunar New Year! I thought I would take this opportunity to share a simple new years practice that I do every January in order to set intentions for the year ahead. I think it's super important to reflect on the previous year and take some time to think about what happened before diving straight into what's next. It helps us connect with what really matters and offers clarity around where we need to focus our attention and maybe need more help/growth. This practice is meant to be super intuitive and led by your feelings, not logic or strategy. It's less about coming up with concrete goals and more about being intentional about how you want to feel in the year ahead and what you need to do to achieve that. I hope this exercise helps you set your own intentions for 2023 and feel motivated to get what you want. x, A @alexandra.cadiz @attunedpodcast

I’m so tired of this invisible narrative that we have to wait for someone else to say our shit is good before we say it ourselves. That we need external validation in order to believe that our creativity is worthy of being shared with the world. We don’t have to wait, we can give that to ourselves right now. We can be our own best hype person, we can flip the narrative in our head and declare that we’re Good instead of waiting for someone else to.  I feel like one of the most radical things a person can do is declare their own greatness. It’s not vain, it’s not arrogant. It’s just taboo. The most magnetic people to me are people who have said - damn, I’m really really good at this and the world deserves to see it. Think Lizzo vibes. That shit is magnetic affff and I think we're all capable of doing it for ourselves and building that kind of confidence from within.  In this episode I hype you up to hype yourself up and I promise you'll walk away feeling reinvigorated to dive into your own creative projects and hit the ground running in the new year. x, A @alexandra.cadiz @attunedpodcast

At this very moment I feel more in my body and aligned with how I physically show up in the world than I ever have in my life. I used to feel guilty about wanting material things like clothes, makeup jewelry & nice shit. But now I see the physical things I select in my life as a form of self expression. A way to align how I feel inside with my external world.  When we level up, do the emotional work and start truly loving ourself on the inside, it naturally shows. And being intentional about how we curate our physical world on the outside contributes greatly to embodying that confidence. It is deeply important, not frivolous or vain.  In this episode I talk about this concept and share my journey to embracing how I express myself on the outside and invest in the material things in my life. This episode is for anyone who has been struggling with their own physical identity and needs that little extra encouragement to go for it and take a risk. xx  Follow me to stay up to date on new episodes: @alexandra.cadiz @attunedpodcast

The creative process is never easy or straightforward, and pursuing multiple creative projects at once can make it even harder. In this episode I talk about the ups and downs I've been going through the past few months with my own projects, two big  reframes that have helped me keep going, and a lot more including... - How being overwhelmed with the amount of work on your plate can make you feel  disconnected from yourself and the purpose of your creative endeavors - The fear that if you neglect one creative project or put it on the back burner for a bit it will fall behind and never go anywhere - The struggle with switching between different parts of your brain when working on multiple projects and giving yourself grace to not be hyper creative & hyper productive all the time - Normalizing  being at capacity with life and work and not having a lot to give to all your creative projects no matter how important they are to you - The pressure of timelines we put on ourselves to achieve things by a certain date or age - Questioning your identity as a creative and the gap between knowing who you are deep down and trying to communicate that to the world This episode is for anyone struggling with their own creative process and feeling a little stuck or discouraged. I really believe that what is meant for you will always come back to you and you will come back to it, so trust yourself and keep going my loves. xx  Follow me to stay up to date on new episodes: @alexandra.cadiz @attunedpodcast

A lot of the time it's super hard to give ourselves what we need because we don't even know what we need, let alone that we're in need. We don't always have the awareness to know when to stop, pull back, or leave a  situation that is no longer aligned. Especially in a society where we're conditioned to "stick it out," just keep going, and push ourselves, it's easy to become disconnected from ourselves and have no idea how we really feel. I'm currently working on (and struggling) with this, so in this episode I reflect on past experiences where and how I'm trying to implement boundaries and "non-negotiables" to give myself what I need in my life now. Follow me to stay up to date on new episodes: @alexandra.cadiz @attunedpodcast

As someone who grew up taking care of everyone else, I've always been terrible at recognizing my own needs and asking for help. It took me a long time to finally start committing to my healing and my mental health, so deciding to go to therapy every single week was a huge accomplishment for me. My story is not linear, and I learned so much in the process of finding the right therapist, going consistently for three years, and doing different types of therapy including individual and couples therapy. The intention of this episode is not to tell you what you should do, or claim to be an expert on any of this (I'm definitely not).  It's to share my own experience in detail and encourage you to reflect on yours whether you're thinking of going to therapy, trying to find the right therapist, wanting to get more out of your sessions, or are just curious. In this episode I share:   - Why I realized I needed to go to therapy - My struggles in finding the right therapist  - How I knew when I found the right therapist and what we we talked about in some of my first sessions with her - How therapy has helped me dig into my own childhood experiences and connect the dots in my adult life - How it's helped me reframe the way I see the world and relate to myself and other people - Why I think we can all benefit from trying talk therapy, and how it can be a first step in finding other forms of therapy that work for us - Individual therapy vs Couples therapy  - A ton of other stuff Therapy Resources   Local in LA:  https://www.theholdingspace.center/  https://www.drsamrader.com/source-code-psychology  https://www.flowhousetherapy.com/  http://www.michelleharwelltherapy.com/#services https://asktia.com/services/mental-health/ Online Services:  https://cerebral.com/ https://www.betterhelp.com/  Follow me to stay up to date on new episodes: @alexandra.cadiz @attunedpodcast

Something I always try and remind myself is that the only difference between me and someone doing what I want to be doing is not that they are more talented or capable than I am — it’s that they decided to do it.  They believed in their intention, the why behind what they do and didn't let the how stop them. When I started Studio Cadiz (the architecture & design studio I ran for 3 years), I didn't have more experience, knowledge, money, connections or credibility than anyone else. In fact, I had very little of those things compared to other designers my age, but what I lacked in ability, I made up for in conviction and intention. To this day, I attribute it's success so much more to that than to being a good designer. The paradox of confidence is that we so often  feel like we need to be the best in order to truly believe in ourselves, but we can't reach that level if we don't have confidence to begin with. So realizing that your confidence comes from your intention and not your ability is a huge unlock because it gives you permission to believe in yourself now, not wait until you're some perfect version of yourself because that doesn't really exist. This episode is for anyone who finds themselves getting in their own way and sabotaging the thing that's really on their heart because they keep questioning their ability. It's for all my design babes, the freelance creatives and small business owners out there, or anyone trying to pursue something meaningful to them but keeps getting knocked down by self doubt. You will walk away from this episode feeling charged up and ready to just fcking go for it, I promise.  References in the episode - Lewis Howes Podcast The Venice Project Photos Follow me to stay up to date on new episodes - @alexandrascadiz @attunedpodcast

Not gonna lie, the past few weeks have been brutal for me and I'm at the point in burn out where I don't even feel like a person. From the 1% of what I share of my life on social media, or the limited time I see people in social settings I might seem like I'm chillin' and have it all together, while on the inside I've low key been a mess. And you know what, that's just the season I'm in right now. When you reach a certain level of success, or finally achieve the thing you've been wanting, sometimes it comes with unexpected stressors. In order to move through them you just gotta do what you gotta do. There is no shame in prioritizing your goals, your self and your pile of work if it's getting you closer to more sustainable freedom, comfort, joy, or whatever you really want and value in life. Follow me to stay up to date on new episodes - @alexandrascadiz @attunedpodcast

Trying to find the words to speak about the heartbreaking and future-altering news we received on Friday June 24th that Roe vs. Wade was overturned and abortion will become illegal in many states across America. Finding an Abortion clinic abortionfinder.org ineedana.com Finding Abortion Pills plancpills.org heyjane.co Finding Financial Assistance abortionfunds.org NAF Hotline 800-772-9100 Finding Legal Assistance reprolegalhelpline.org aidaccess.org Glennon Doyle's Podcast: We can do hard things Follow me to stay up to date on new episodes - @alexandrascadiz @attunedpodcast

Stay up to date on new episodes at... @alexandrascadiz @attunedpodcast

This past weekend I turned 29 and had a karaoke rager to celebrate. Going into the last year of my twenties has brought up all types of feelings for me so in this episode I discuss my thoughts on birthdays, getting older, then I dive deep into self love babyyyy. I recently had an experience where I was intensely fixating on a situation and just couldn't get past it. I talked about it with my therapist and my close friends, but it wasn't until one of my best friends told me "I know you're going to hate to hear this, but it all comes back to self love." In that moment I had the biggest unlock - I was fixating on things outside of myself in order to get a feeling that I can actually get all on my own. I just wasn't prioritizing myself enough to create the space for me to do the things that fill up my cup. Instead I was looking to other people and situations to give me that feeling, then blaming them when it wasn't available to me. But in the end, it's not about anyone else, it's always about ourselves.    Stay up to date on new episodes at... @alexandrascadiz @attunedpodcast

In a continuation from last weeks episode, I dive deeper into overwhelm and break down 7 things to remember when you're feeling overwhelmed: 1. Stop gaslighting yourself 2. You can only do one thing at a time 3. Most things are not the end of the world 4. Everyone feels the same way 5. Don't let it live in your head, talk it out 6. Use the "and then what" strategy 7. Control is an illusion Listen to the whole episode for in depth details and examples for each point. While my last episode was more of a riff on the general topic over overwhelm, this one is meant to give you tangible things you can walk away with and apply to your own life. Stay up to date on new episodes at... @alexandrascadiz @attunedpodcast

Overwhelm is something that plagues me on the daily. I am constantly trying to keep up with a crazy schedule, scaling a business, so many different projects, friends, family, staying connected to myself and filling up my own cup, etc etc the list goes on. I know I'm not the only one and a lot of us deal with this constantly. Overwhelm comes at us from different directions - from the concrete things we need to do, to things happening in our relationships, to the emotions and feelings we have about those things,  and then the feelings we have ABOUT our feelings. It's a real fcking snowball effect. So in this episode I discuss ways to combat that and just riff on overwhelm in general.  Stay up to date on new episodes at... @alexandrascadiz @attunedpodcast

Growing up, your identity can be heavily shaped by your environment and the roles you play - things like your ethnicity, where you live, what you like and who you hang out with. That then translates into your adult life in the form of what you do for work, what  obligations you have, what car you drive, etc.  But none of those things are actually who you are. Your identity isn't anything external that you do, its more so about how you feel , your core character underneath all those labels - your essence. When I first heard that idea in therapy I was like, wtf, my essence??? Like, how I smell?? lol But now I really really get it, and I know that it doesn't matter if I'm an architect, an artist, a musician, a  podcaster, a third culture kid, mixed race, or whatever else. Those things don't make me me, what makes me me is who I am without all that stuff, and the same goes for all of us.  The song I mentioned that I just released... Eden Stay up to date on new episodes at... @alexandrascadiz @attunedpodcast