[BRACKET!]

Cullen, Dan, and Jesse get together and talk about something they've been meaning to discuss for a long time: video games.

Dreams... where do they come from? And where do they go? Some say if you dream it, you can do it. Personally I don't see the logic in that, because I don't know how my elementary school bully is gonna pick me up and drop me into a grave, but hey, anything's possible.

Dan and Jesse review 2019's Summer Blockbuster, Ryan Reynold's Detective Pikachu.

Colors. We use 'em for categorization, but isn't it about time someone figured out what the best color is? Seeing as how no one in the history of time has ever contested this topic before, [BRACKET!] investigates.

"Ssssomebody's ssssssmokin' 'round here!" Yessir, we're all big Carreyheads aroiund here. "Sssssufferin' ssssuccotash!" The man looks to be as zany as ever in his upcoming role as Older Jim Carrey and we can't wait.

EDITOR'S NOTE: this episode was recorded before the release of Disney and Marvel's AVENGERS: ENDGAME and thus does not discuss a single plot point from said film, like how Danny Phantom shows up to replace Vision or how Antonio Man finds the hidden seventh Infinity Stone hidden deep within Thanos' rectum.

What's a folx to do when you got all these Scotts out there? Compare and contrast them, of course! Ranking arbitrary concepts based on intrinsic value is the only joy left to be found!

Have you ever thought "it sure does hurt to walk around in my bare feet, I wish they made some sort of protection for my sensitive feet"? Well you're in luck!

Dan's at PAX East and Persia's out of town, so it's up to them good ol' boys Cullen and Jesse to take the opportunity to make something the world has never seen before or since: a wrestling podcast.

We're taking a look brack! Recovered from the archives, enjoy this re-broadcast of the very first episode of [BRACKET!], recorded over five years ago when audio quality wasn't even a thing!

It's a dollar menu deathmatch as we kick off Sesason Fifteen with our favorite hot eats and cool treats! Join us for Jesse's least favorite hour of the week to find out which foods are best to dunk in a Frosty and who has the best fries in the biz! Round 1: Frosty vs Coney | McD's Apple Pie vs Big Mac | French Fries vs Crunchwrap Supreme | Breakfast Sandwich vs McRib | Doritos Locos Tacos vs Chicken Nuggets | Filet O Fish vs DQ Blizzard | Whopper vs Arby's Roast Beef | Wendy's Spicy Chicken Sandwich vs Shamrock Shake Spoil the Bracket

The season fourteen finale, featuring your favorite normal adults who love the Tarzan soundtrack. ROUND 1: School of Rock vs Choco Taco | New Donk City vs Santa Monica | Heart (band) vs Strangers Like Me (Tarzan) | Nightmare Before Christmas vs Ice Cube | Cooking vs Face Masks | Tacos vs Cold Pizza | Commode vs 4th of July | Hamburglar vs Gudetama Website Twitter Patreon Spoil the bracket

Welcome to the first episode of March! Only brackets on this show. Yessiree. No dumb bits that would be exclusionary to new listeners. Absolutely not. ROUND 1: Old School vs Preschool | Military School vs Summer School | High School vs Wayside | School of Fish vs Hogwarts | School of Rock vs Cullenary* School | Boarding School vs Clown School | Elementary School vs Police Academy | Too Cool For School vs Magic School Bus Twitter Patreon Bracket Spoilers

Sixteen sweethearts. Four Goofy impressions. One winner. Joe Manji. Round 1: Heartbreaker vs Heart Attack | Kingdom Hearts vs Two of Hearts | The Heartland vs Real Ass Heart | Heart of the Cards vs Heartthrob | iHeartRadio vs My Heart Will Go On | Heart (band) vs Heart of the Ocean | Hearthstone vs Bravehart | Kevin Hart vs Luvdisc

Sixteen sweethearts. Four Goofy impressions. One winner. Joe Manji. Round 1: Heartbreaker vs Heart Attack | Kingdom Hearts vs Two of Hearts | The Heartland vs Real Ass Heart | Heart of the Cards vs Heartthrob | iHeartRadio vs My Heart Will Go On | Heart (band) vs Heart of the Ocean | Hearthstone vs Bravehart | Kevin Hart vs Luvdisc

Awww...intervention! Jesse has been spending a bit too much time with free-to-play shooters, so we've stacked sixteen new hobbies for Jesse in a bracket to find out which personal project will help Jesse in 2019! Will he be the next great geocacher, or Gordon Ramsay's new best friend? It probably won't be bowling, though, considering he got his hand stuck in the ball. Patreon Twitter Spoilers

Awww…intervention! Jesse has been spending a bit too much time with free-to-play shooters, so we’ve stacked sixteen new hobbies for Jesse in a bracket to find out which personal project will help Jesse in 2019! Will he be the next great geocacher, or Gordon Ramsay’s new best friend? It probably won’t be bowling, though, considering he got his hand stuck in the ball. Patreon Twitter Spoilers

Hoo boy this is a sloppy one folks. Just a real nosedive into the mud. We took sixteen of our favorite....modes? And then Jesse fixed himself a drink? And then Persia fixed herself drink(s???)? You can try to put of scoop of ice cream on this episode but I'm not sure it'll make it go down easier. Website Patreon Twitter Bracket Spoilers

Hoo boy this is a sloppy one folks. Just a real nosedive into the mud. We took sixteen of our favorite….modes? And then Jesse fixed himself a drink? And then Persia fixed herself drink(s???)? You can try to put of scoop of ice cream on this episode but I’m not sure it’ll make it go down easier. Website Patreon Twitter Bracket Spoilers

It's time to party til the sun comes up as the sixteen best nights duke it out from dusk til dawn! Personally, nighttime has always been terrifying. I would wrap my head and neck in three blankets as a kid so vampires wouldn't be able to suck my blood while I slept. My parents were more concerned about me suffocating myself but I'm 26 and still vampire-free so who's laughing now? Website Patreon Twitter