DIY for Your Soul Podcast

We all have moments in our lives that we wish never happened. We’ve all been through situations that we would never want to go back and do again. And due to these difficult experiences, most of us likely have scars, physical and emotional, that we wish we didn’t have. Often times we hold on to the hurt that caused the scars; particularly when caused by other people. In this podcast, we’re looking at how the negative events we experienced in our lives, and the negative messages we took in from other, as a way to define ourselves, left scars that we not only need to accept, but that we also need to learn to embrace. And in the process of doing so, we’re likely to see what life lessons they hold for us. We can begin to ask ourselves, Who might you not have been today if it weren’t for the rough patches? And when we put them into their proper perspective, and see where they brought us, we might even actually begin to be grateful for them. We might even learn to love them.

We all have moments in our lives that we wish never happened. We’ve all been through situations that we would never want to go back and do again. And due to these difficult experiences, most of us likely have scars, physical and emotional, that we wish we didn’t have. Often times we hold on to the hurt that caused the scars; particularly when caused by other people. In this podcast, we’re looking at how the negative events we experienced in our lives, and the negative messages we took in from other, as a way to define ourselves, left scars that we not only need to accept, but that we also need to learn to embrace. And in the process of doing so, we’re likely to see what life lessons they hold for us. We can begin to ask ourselves, Who might you not have been today if it weren’t for the rough patches? And when we put them into their proper perspective, and see where they brought us, we might even actually begin to be grateful for them. We might even learn to love them.

In the podcast entitled, embracing diversity, we delved into the idea that it is our differences that ultimately make life more interesting and make us stronger in the long run. But when people behave in ways that don’t fit our desires, or our cultural or societal norms, we shun them. We tend to want everyone to be the same, to fall into an accepted mold. But in doing so, we fail to realize that this would thwart our individual and collective growth. And the ironically is, for all of our differences, we are probably more alike than we realize. In this podcast, we’re taking the idea of embracing diversity one step further. We’re learning that for as different as we all are, and as much as those differences make life interesting, when it all comes down to it, we’re far more alike than not. And by accepting that we are more alike than not, we become better able to create lasting relationships, and a sense of belonging. We create an atmosphere where true community can exist, which fosters the kind of growth that leads us towards the life of our dreams

In the podcast entitled, embracing diversity, we delved into the idea that it is our differences that ultimately make life more interesting and make us stronger in the long run. But when people behave in ways that don’t fit our desires, or our cultural or societal norms, we shun them. We tend to want everyone to be the same, to fall into an accepted mold. But in doing so, we fail to realize that this would thwart our individual and collective growth. And the ironically is, for all of our differences, we are probably more alike than we realize. In this podcast, we’re taking the idea of embracing diversity one step further. We’re learning that for as different as we all are, and as much as those differences make life interesting, when it all comes down to it, we’re far more alike than not. And by accepting that we are more alike than not, we become better able to create lasting relationships, and a sense of belonging. We create an atmosphere where true community can exist, which fosters the kind of growth that leads us towards the life of our dreams

There are many reasons we find ourselves wishing that things were different than what they are. One is that we tend to judge most things, especially in terms of good and bad. We want to experience only what we deem good and keep the bad at bay. We compare and despair, mistaking what we see on the outside as truth, not realizing that things aren’t often as they seem. We might begin to think that something is wrong with us. We take on a woe is me attitude and soon find ourselves down in the dumps. If asked what’s wrong, we’re likely to say we are just unhappy. What we are ultimately talking about here are expectations. We are talking about our need for things, people, situations and life itself to show up in the manner that we desire, so that we can then be happy. And because things, people, situations and life itself often don’t show up exactly as we expect them to, we often find ourselves in a state of unhappiness. In this podcast, we’re talking about how our need for certain outcomes, our expectations, keeps us from experiencing the sense of well being and happiness we so desire. We’re being reminded that we must stop waiting for everything to show up like we think it should and learn to take things as they come. We’re discovering that an expectation, is a premeditated resentment.

There are many reasons we find ourselves wishing that things were different than what they are. One is that we tend to judge most things, especially in terms of good and bad. We want to experience only what we deem good and keep the bad at bay. We compare and despair, mistaking what we see on the outside as truth, not realizing that things aren’t often as they seem. We might begin to think that something is wrong with us. We take on a woe is me attitude and soon find ourselves down in the dumps. If asked what’s wrong, we’re likely to say we are just unhappy. What we are ultimately talking about here are expectations. We are talking about our need for things, people, situations and life itself to show up in the manner that we desire, so that we can then be happy. And because things, people, situations and life itself often don’t show up exactly as we expect them to, we often find ourselves in a state of unhappiness. In this podcast, we’re talking about how our need for certain outcomes, our expectations, keeps us from experiencing the sense of well being and happiness we so desire. We’re being reminded that we must stop waiting for everything to show up like we think it should and learn to take things as they come. We’re discovering that an expectation, is a premeditated resentment.

We all have our own issues that we bring to the table. In many instances, our issues clash. Each of us is playing out our issues never thinking of what affect it has on those around us. We are too absorbed own personal mythology. In the podcast about Control, we looked the human tendency to want to hold sway over our fellow man. We talked about how we try to get those around us, especially those who we are closest to, who are different in some way, to be the people we want them to be – to believe, think and act in a manner that we deem correct. But most people don’t like to be controlled. When it becomes obvious that this is what we are up to, they tend to put up a fight – or they play along, but do what they want to do anyway. So we have to change tactics. We find subtler ways of exerting our power over them. In this podcast, we’re diving a little deeper into the subject of control. We’re looking at the tool many of us use to try influence others into being who we want them to be. We’re talking about manipulation, and how it may work in the short term, but in the long term, it’s usually disastrous.

We all have our own issues that we bring to the table. In many instances, our issues clash. Each of us is playing out our issues never thinking of what affect it has on those around us. We are too absorbed own personal mythology. In the podcast about Control, we looked the human tendency to want to hold sway over our fellow man. We talked about how we try to get those around us, especially those who we are closest to, who are different in some way, to be the people we want them to be – to believe, think and act in a manner that we deem correct. But most people don’t like to be controlled. When it becomes obvious that this is what we are up to, they tend to put up a fight – or they play along, but do what they want to do anyway. So we have to change tactics. We find subtler ways of exerting our power over them. In this podcast, we’re diving a little deeper into the subject of control. We’re looking at the tool many of us use to try influence others into being who we want them to be. We’re talking about manipulation, and how it may work in the short term, but in the long term, it’s usually disastrous.

It is very common for humans to see themselves a victims of circumstance. We assume the reality we experience is the direct result of myriad outside forces. We often deny the part we each play in the world in which we live. But each and every time we hold on to the story of our past, instead of letting it go and creating something new, we think, choose and act in ways that creates an existence that supports our story. Every time we choose to see things the way we’ve always seen them, instead of being willing to alter our perspective, we more than likely create a reality that is stuck in the past. When we require life to show up in a certain way, or expect ourselves or those around us to fit a certain mode, we block all other possibilities and our life reflects it. Our failure to accept ourselves, others and life itself limits our choices; thus limiting our world. Our inability to create healthy supportive communities, ones that assists in fostering a sense of wellbeing, lead us to creating less than fulfilling lives. And history simply repeats itself. In this podcast, we’re challenging the idea that we are at the affect of life’s circumstances and discovering that we are actually the cause of them – that we are the creators of our own reality. Some come through life seeing themselves as victims, as unworthy, while others see themselves as stars, full of potential. And, in either case, we operate from our beliefs about ourselves through our thoughts, our choices and our actions; thus we create a world that reflects our deepest held beliefs.

It is very common for humans to see themselves a victims of circumstance. We assume the reality we experience is the direct result of myriad outside forces. We often deny the part we each play in the world in which we live. But each and every time we hold on to the story of our past, instead of letting it go and creating something new, we think, choose and act in ways that creates an existence that supports our story. Every time we choose to see things the way we’ve always seen them, instead of being willing to alter our perspective, we more than likely create a reality that is stuck in the past. When we require life to show up in a certain way, or expect ourselves or those around us to fit a certain mode, we block all other possibilities and our life reflects it. Our failure to accept ourselves, others and life itself limits our choices; thus limiting our world. Our inability to create healthy supportive communities, ones that assists in fostering a sense of wellbeing, lead us to creating less than fulfilling lives. And history simply repeats itself. In this podcast, we’re challenging the idea that we are at the affect of life’s circumstances and discovering that we are actually the cause of them – that we are the creators of our own reality. Some come through life seeing themselves as victims, as unworthy, while others see themselves as stars, full of potential. And, in either case, we operate from our beliefs about ourselves through our thoughts, our choices and our actions; thus we create a world that reflects our deepest held beliefs.

Many of us try to mold other people into being who we want them to be, or expecting them to think and act as we see fit. In other words, we resort to control. Many of us will dispute the fact that we are exhibiting controlling tendencies. We will argue that we just have another’s best interest at heart. We just want them to be happy. But in reality, we want them to conform to our world view to make ourselves happy. In this podcast, we come to recognize control as the illusion that it is. We learn that it is best to live our lives and let others do the same. Doing so, will likely require us to deal with some of our own fears and anxieties, but if we want to live truly happy and healthy lives, we’re going to have to do that anyway. And in the end, it allows us to form relationships based in mutual acceptance instead of everyone having to mold themselves to fit someone else’s desires.

The old saying says it’s better to give than to receive. But giving isn’t the opposite of receiving. It is part and parcel of it. In this podcast we learn that giving and receiving are all part of the same energy; two sides of the same coin. And we discover that being of service is one of the quickest ways to attract to us what we desire for ourselves. And this is because when we give something to someone else, our minds are forced to believe that we have that thing we are giving away—for you cannot give what you do not have. Thus, if you want a life filled with mental, emotional and spiritual abundance, be of service. Because through service, we are reminded that doing for others is doing for ourselves.

Humans tend to fear things that are dissimilar, especially when we’ve never been exposed to these things. It is likely just part of human nature to gravitate towards those things in our comfort zones. This tendency to stick with what we know, doesn’t serve us though. It keeps us trapped in a very small worldview. It limits our choices and options. It breeds disharmony. In reality, we would all likely be much better off if we faced our fears of those things that are different from us. We’d find life so much easier to navigate if we just learned that diversity isn’t something to avoid, it’s something to embrace. In this podcast we discover that diversity in people, different skin colors, different cultures, different religions, different opinions, is what makes life interesting. If we were all exactly the same, life would be monotonous. By embracing our differences, instead of trying to make everyone conform to our ways of thinking and acting, we are better able to create much more interesting lives for ourselves.

The question, “Who am I?” is as old as mankind itself. From the time we are born, we begin the process of defining who we are. And as most of us have already discovered, the way we define ourselves is very much dependant on how others have defined us. Thus we move through life thinking this or that about ourselves because that’s who we were told we were. But living the life we desire—the life of our dreams—requires us to commence defining ourselves. I requires that we begin to discover our own answers to that age old question of “Who am I?” In this podcast we learn just how important answering this question is. We discover the power of “I am” when we recognize that whatever we think or say that follows these two words almost always dictates the choices we make. Thus when you stick to the same old I am’s that you’ve always fallen back on, then the life you desire, and the becoming the person you want to be, is not very likely. Because like it or not, who you think you are, at your very core, is who you become.

Our ability to think is what sets us apart from the rest of the living world. It’s the thing that allows us not just to live life, but to choose how we want to live it. It’s what lets us define life, as well as defining our place in this life. In many ways, our thoughts are one of the greatest gifts we have been given; the ability to live life consciously. We don’t simply get to exist, we get to shape our existence. Yet it is our greatest tool that we often wield as our biggest weapon, against others, and ourselves. The very same thing that gives us the ability to make choices, and to act on those decisions to create the lives we live, also keeps us trapped in old, and limiting, beliefs that can keep us stuck in a proverbial rut. In this podcast we discover that when we live on autopilot, and let our thoughts run wild because that’s what they’ve always done, we shouldn’t at all be surprised that the outcomes aren’t what we want them to be. So we must learn to monitor our thoughts. We then have to take it a step further and examine why we are thinking what we are. We’ve got to think. And we have to begin to do so in a conscious manner. Because if our lives aren’t where we want them to be, but we’re not willing to change our thoughts, then we’re just going to remain where we are.

Humans, by are very nature, are social beings. We crave connection. Each of us wants to feel seen, heard and accepted. In other words we want to be loved. But when we live in unhealthy situations long enough, many of us mistakenly begin to think that when it comes to living our lives, we have to go it alone. In this podcast we find that “going it alone” isn’t really the best way to move ourselves forward. Without support, we just tend to fall back on the default beliefs and behaviors that got us where we are. Thus, we learn that it’s best to create a truly healthy support system for ourselves. When we do this, we are better able to take risks and try out new ideas and behaviors. And the results are mental, emotional and spiritual growth that help us create the life of our dreams.

The concept of being powerless is one that gives great pause to many. Countless people face myriad problems and think that the only way to deal with them is to power through – mind over matter. But the reality is that there are many things over which we have absolutely no power. We just resist admitting it because we ultimately equate it to helpless. But this couldn’t be further from the truth. In this podcast, we discover that the concept of being powerless merely suggests that we stop fighting; that we admit that there are certain aspects of ourselves and of life, that we can’t simply overpower. It suggests that the very act of constant struggling against those parts of ourselves that make us uncomfortable, actually strengthens those aspects. By resisting all the things that we deem negative, we actually give them more power. Accepting this frees us to discover the choices we do have in any given situation. Acknowledging that we are powerless over people, places and things, allows us to discover the true power that we genuinely have. And ultimately we are beings with an immense amount of power. Thus we learn that That power is the power over how things affect us. It is not the power to change the circumstances of the situation; it is the power to change how it influences our lives. In this we are empowered. By focusing on the power that we have, we can ease the pain and anxiety that many of us face in life.

When we think of abundance, the first word that comes to most people’s minds is likely wealth, or money. The most common idea about abundance is that it is about all of the things we have been able to acquire. It’s all about what we have. In this podcast we learn that although wealth can be a component of abundance, it’s not the entirety of it. We’ll discover that despite what we might think, abundance is not a state of having, it’s actually a state of being. And in the end, we will see that the feeling of abundance is one that we choose or reject. We can either be the person who sees the incredible wealth that weaves itself through our lives each and every day, or we turn a blind eye to it and never be satisfied no matter what shows up. It’s up to us to decide.

In the podcasted entitled, The Importance of Learning to Trust, we learned that trust is a skill that has to be developed. Trust is not something to be taken lightly or given away freely. People need to earn our trust. When people mishandle it, we are not obligated to continue giving it. But withholding it altogether, out of fear that we will be let down, only serves to isolate us and ultimately stunt our overall growth. Now that podcast focused on the importance of trust; the need to become willing to accept that we need each other and that this often requires some level of trust. But, admittedly, it didn’t go into details about how we learn to trust. But how do we deal with the people in our lives that we find challenging to deal with? How do we keep people from taking advantage of us? What do we do when we realize that we’re being manipulated? In this podcast, we discover that the answer to all of these questions is boundaries. We learn that boundaries are simply personal guidelines we create for ourselves that define what behaviors directed at us are appropriate or not. We’ll also come to find that boundaries are our way of honoring ourselves. It is our way of instructing people how to treat us. And if we don’t teach people how to treat us, they will simply treat us the way they want to. So if we cannot, or will not, take on the task of learning to set boundaries for ourselves, then we will likely continue to feel victimized. But that feeling is not a fact. If we don’t set healthy boundaries for ourselves, then we’re not really victims, we’re volunteers.

We all, at some time or another, experience tough times. It’s just part of life. But most of us are not too happy when difficulties arise. We often feel like life is throwing a monkey wrench into things. It’s perfectly normal for us to seek out permanence and stability in our lives. This is just human nature. It gives us a feeling of safety and security. But this is not the nature of life, and these things were never promised to us. Whether we like it or not, we, every single one of us, are in a constant cycle of life, death and rebirth. Such is the circle of life. In these challenging moments, we may find ourselves asking, “Why me? This too, is also normal human behavior. In this podcast, we will learn that the question, when we find ourselves in difficult situations, shouldn’t be, “Why me?” It’s really, “Why not me?” We will also discover that it’s a waste of time ruminating on why this or that thing that you don’t like is happening to you. It’s happening because it’s happening. And it’s going to happen the way it happens whether you accept it or not. Thus, much of the pain we experience is exactly what we decide it’s going to be, whether we do so consciously or not. Either we accept, and live life on life’s terms, or we suffer through it. It’s our choice.