Life and Love In the Q Podcast

This is the final segment of the self-care tools that Jill and Dr. Treisha have found to be helpful to them-- and this self-care tool from Dr. Treisha may surprise you. It's definitely not new, but it's gotten a bad rap for decades. Lately, however, it seems like people are rediscovering the many benefits of this potential path to healing. Note that you should always consult your medical care team prior to engaging in any type of care. We're not it. We're just two people sharing our experience and what worked for us. Okay? Great.  Connect With Us: For questions, comments, and more email: LifeAndLoveIntheQ@gmail.com  Schedule a counseling session with Dr. Treisha at https://calendly.com/treishapeterson/60min Schedule a support session with Jillian Abby at https://calendly.com/jillianabby/lgbtqiasupport More from Treisha Peterson, PhD: https://linktr.ee/treishapeterson More from Jillian Abby: https://linktr.ee/jillianabby

In this episode, Jill and Dr. Treisha continue their discussion of self-care with a deeper dive into two of the somato-emotional tools they've used to help them take care of their physical, mental, and emotional health. This episode also dives into a very frank discussion about not feeling good even when we do all of the things to help us feel good. It's an honest talk about why real life can just give us more than we're prepared to handle-- even with all of the self-care tools at our disposal.  And THIS conversation continued on long enough that we broke it into another episode for next week where Dr. Treisha discusses one self-care tool that you may be shocked to find out she is a fan of! Connect With Us: For questions, comments, and more email: LifeAndLoveIntheQ@gmail.com  Schedule a counseling session with Dr. Treisha at https://calendly.com/treishapeterson/60min Schedule a support session with Jillian Abby at https://calendly.com/jillianabby/lgbtqiasupport More from Treisha Peterson, PhD: https://linktr.ee/treishapeterson More from Jillian Abby: https://linktr.ee/jillianabby

Ahhh... self-care. That thing which every person is told to make time for-- what also being wildly unclear about what self-care actually is and what types of self-care are beneficial. In the first episode of this two-part series, we talk about the specific tools that have worked for us, from the free to the bigger investments of time and money. We also discuss what types of things are NOT actually self-care and what things may be self-care to some but maladaptive to others.  Have a type of self-care that works for you? Share with us at LifeAndLoveInTheQ@gmail.com and maybe we'll include your answer in a future episode! Connect With Us: Schedule a counseling session with Dr. Treisha at https://calendly.com/treishapeterson/60min Schedule a support session with Jillian Abby at https://calendly.com/jillianabby/lgbtqiasupport More from Treisha Peterson, PhD: https://linktr.ee/treishapeterson More from Jillian Abby: https://linktr.ee/jillianabby

Allyship is important for marginalized groups, especially nowadays. Allies almost always take a risk by supporting those who need it, at no real benefit to themselves. But is there a such thing as an unsafe ally? And why would someone hold themselves out as an ally if they're not genuinely supporting those they claim to support? In this episode, Jill and Treisha talk about unsafe allyship and what things people say and do that can make them feel like unsafe allies. If this episode brings up any questions or feelings in you, please reach out to us at LifeAndLoveInTheQ@gmail.com. We'd love to know what you think!   SUBSCRIBE. LIKE. REVIEW. Thank you so much for supporting our work and helping spread the word.

Our world is rapidly evolving when it comes to our conversations around the concepts of gender, sex, and identity. Understandably, it can be challenging to understand what some terminology means. In this episode, Jill and Dr. Treisha dive into two terms that they've received multiple questions on lately-- gender dysphoria and identity distress. Through talking about it, they each had their own lightbulb moments on the terms and how they show up in our lives. Have something LGBTQIA+ related that you'd like more clarity on? Email LifeAndLoveInTheQ@gmail.com  Connect With Us: Schedule a counseling session with Dr. Treisha at https://calendly.com/treishapeterson/60min Schedule a support session with Jillian Abby at https://calendly.com/jillianabby/lgbtqiasupport More from Treisha Peterson, PhD: https://linktr.ee/treishapeterson More from Jillian Abby: https://linktr.ee/jillianabby

What the heck is triangulation? In this episode, Jill and Dr. Treisha talk about the many ways triangulation appears in our conflicts or identity discrepancies, and why it has the power to really mess things up. As with so many things in life, awareness of when triangulation is present is an important first step. You'll hear in today's episode that Jill is continuing to wrap her brain around the concept. If you are too, reach out to us via email with your questions at LifeAndLoveInTheQ@gmail.com or contact us directly on social media. 

Way back in the day in Episode 18, we discussed some ways to handle when life hands you hard choices. This is a bonus episode we recorded from that as our conversation continued.  Treisha discusses why she taught her yoga students to fail at poses. Jill discusses why people come out and what the heck took her so long to get there. Why there isn't more knowledge explaining the coming out process now? How do you know if you're LGBTQ? The hierarchy of wisdom that makes us question our life choices. Who is voicing your narrative? Connect With Us: For questions, comments, and more email: LifeAndLoveIntheQ@gmail.com  Schedule a counseling session with Dr. Treisha at https://calendly.com/treishapeterson/60min Schedule a support session with Jillian Abby at https://calendly.com/jillianabby/lgbtqiasupport More from Treisha Peterson, PhD: https://linktr.ee/treishapeterson More from Jillian Abby: https://linktr.ee/jillianabby

We often think of trauma as a certain event that happens and has a profound impact on our well-being. But what about when you're stuck in a constant conflict with no resolution in sight? Uncertainty trauma happens during the shifts in our life and can result in additional shame and masking. It's also where microaggressions show up quite often! Treisha shares some examples of uncertainty trauma related to the church and what that means for families and provides tools and ideas for breaking out of the uncertainty loop.  Listen in and let us know what you think! Connect With Us: For questions, comments, and more email: LifeAndLoveIntheQ@gmail.com  Schedule a counseling session with Dr. Treisha at https://calendly.com/treishapeterson/60min Schedule a support session with Jillian Abby at https://calendly.com/jillianabby/lgbtqiasupport More from Treisha Peterson, PhD: https://linktr.ee/treishapeterson More from Jillian Abby: https://linktr.ee/jillianabby

Nearly everyone understands the basics of privilege-- those qualities or life experiences that give one person an extra advantage over another. But it is easy to miss the mark on what your privileges are if you haven't met someone without that advantage.  Microaggressions are those small actions and words that cause minor harm over an extended period of time. Jill calls it "death by a thousand paper cuts" because the damage adds up over time. Can you think of any you've felt in your own life? Privilege means moving through a world that is tailored to your being and ability. Treisha shares the beauty of yoga and why it helps meet people where they're at and Jill brings in her experience as a former homeschooler where kids could be taught according to their strengths. We'd love to know if you had any lightbulb moments from this episode. If so, email us at LifeAndLoveInTheQ@gmail.com. Thank you for your support! Connect With Us: For questions, comments, and more email: LifeAndLoveIntheQ@gmail.com  Schedule a counseling session with Dr. Treisha at https://calendly.com/treishapeterson/60min Schedule a support session with Jillian Abby at https://calendly.com/jillianabby/lgbtqiasupport More from Treisha Peterson, PhD: https://linktr.ee/treishapeterson More from Jillian Abby: https://linktr.ee/jillianabby

Happy Pride Month, Q Crew! We thought for this week we'd dig one of the most popular episodes from our early days and share it with you again... since our listenership has grown quite a bit and you may have missed this one. Pride is a celebration of the LGBTQIA+ identity and the allies who support them. It's a civil rights movement to honor the achievements of the past and recognize areas where more work still needs to be done (strong side-eye to Florida, Texas, and Tennessee). Pride is also a time to hear others' stories. In this episode, Jill discusses why coming out is so much more complicated than people realize. Treisha shares her own experience when her child came out and what that was like as a parent. We hope you'll give it a listen (or relisten) and share the episode with those who need to hear it. Thank you for your support! Connect With Us: For questions, comments, and more email: LifeAndLoveIntheQ@gmail.com  Schedule a counseling session with Dr. Treisha at https://calendly.com/treishapeterson/60min Schedule a support session with Jillian Abby at https://calendly.com/jillianabby/lgbtqiasupport More from Treisha Peterson, PhD: https://linktr.ee/treishapeterson More from Jillian Abby: https://linktr.ee/jillianabby

Jill spent the weekend soaking in the energy of all things Hay House at their I CAN DO IT conference in Tampa. She shares with Treisha the three surprising takeaways from the event that really shifted her perspective and helped her return to herself. Did one or more resonate with you? Email us and let us know! Connect With Us: For questions, comments, and more email: LifeAndLoveIntheQ@gmail.com  Schedule a counseling session with Dr. Treisha at https://calendly.com/treishapeterson/60min Schedule a support session with Jillian Abby at https://calendly.com/jillianabby/lgbtqiasupport More from Treisha Peterson, PhD: https://linktr.ee/treishapeterson More from Jillian Abby: https://linktr.ee/jillianabby Join our Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/user?u=87183097  

In this episode, we talk about the compliment that never feels great. The line that easily rolls off our tongues but never lands gracefully with the recipient... "I don't know how she does it! There is so much to say about the pressures we put on ourselves and others. But why read the show notes when you can just listen to this episode about perfectionism and the human experience? If you like it, please show some star love to our podcast and rate us or leave a review! Connect With Us: For questions, comments, and more email: LifeAndLoveIntheQ@gmail.com  Schedule a counseling session with Dr. Treisha at https://calendly.com/treishapeterson/60min Schedule a support session with Jillian Abby at https://calendly.com/jillianabby/lgbtqiasupport More from Treisha Peterson, PhD: https://linktr.ee/treishapeterson More from Jillian Abby: https://linktr.ee/jillianabby

This discussion is in follow-up to our episode from May 2 (Why Give 100% When You Can Give 70%) and Treisha's insights from her trip to Bali. Do you ever find yourself busying yourself into chaos? Does having more on your plate almost feel like a status symbol? Has the fight-or-flight feeling become your new normal? This episode focuses on the importance of not always growing, transitioning, or moving. It's permission to step back from the chaos and let the dust settle so that you can view your life with fresh eyes.  And we've got a new challenge for you to try in your life! Connect With Us: For questions, comments, and more email: LifeAndLoveIntheQ@gmail.com  Schedule a counseling session with Dr. Treisha at https://calendly.com/treishapeterson/60min Schedule a support session with Jillian Abby at https://calendly.com/jillianabby/lgbtqiasupport More from Treisha Peterson, PhD: https://linktr.ee/treishapeterson More from Jillian Abby: https://linktr.ee/jillianabby Join our Patreon for as low as $5/month: https://www.patreon.com/user?u=87183097

Is it just us? Are we the odd ones out here? Jill and Treisha recently realized that they have something in common-- neither of them look forward to Mother's Day. It's a complicated day for a lot of people, whether that be their status as a mother, their relationship with the mothers in their lives, or the absence of maternal figures or children in their lives.  This episode is the conversation we didn't know if we were allowed to have. But we said it. And here it is.  Connect With Us: For questions, comments, and more email: LifeAndLoveIntheQ@gmail.com  Join our Patreon for as low as $5/month: https://www.patreon.com/user?u=87183097 Schedule a counseling session with Dr. Treisha at https://calendly.com/treishapeterson/60min Schedule a support session with Jillian Abby at https://calendly.com/jillianabby/lgbtqiasupport More from Treisha Peterson, PhD: https://linktr.ee/treishapeterson More from Jillian Abby: https://linktr.ee/jillianabby

Clearly, we're working on recovery from perfectionism over here. On Treisha's recent trip to Bali she learned the power and pleasure that can be derived from living life in a 70/30 balance. Learn what exactly the 70/30 is and how you can incorporate it into your daily life for greater peace, ease, and alignment. Because nobody can (or should) be giving 100% all the damn time! Connect With Us: For questions, comments, and more email: LifeAndLoveIntheQ@gmail.com  Join our Patreon for as low as $5/month: https://www.patreon.com/user?u=87183097 Schedule a counseling session with Dr. Treisha at https://calendly.com/treishapeterson/60min Schedule a support session with Jillian Abby at https://calendly.com/jillianabby/lgbtqiasupport More from Treisha Peterson, PhD: https://linktr.ee/treishapeterson More from Jillian Abby: https://linktr.ee/jillianabby

It's LAUNCH DAY for Jillian Abby's memoir, Perfectly Queer. Hear about how the book came to be and the motivation behind telling her story. This episode is for anyone who is about to start or is in the messy middle of coming out (or anything other challenging life change) and why taking the leap was absolutely 1000% worth it. Treisha also shares her new approach to making life lighter. If you haven't gotten your copy of Perfectly Queer yet, you can buy it here in paperback, ebook, and audiobook. Connect With Us: For questions, comments, and more email: LifeAndLoveIntheQ@gmail.com  Schedule a counseling session with Dr. Treisha at https://calendly.com/treishapeterson/60min Schedule a support session with Jillian Abby at https://calendly.com/jillianabby/lgbtqiasupport More from Treisha Peterson, PhD: https://linktr.ee/treishapeterson More from Jillian Abby: https://linktr.ee/jillianabby Join our Patreon for as low as $5/month: https://www.patreon.com/user?u=87183097

Labels were a big part of Jillian Abby's memoir, Perfectly Queer. In this episode, she and Treisha Peterson, P.h.D. discuss labels from all angles-- the good, the confusing, and why gatekeeping should not even be a part of the labeling equation. Jill discusses why "Queer" was intentionally included in her book title and how she hopes to take the charge out of the word. Treisha discussed a Starbucks interaction that taught her more about labeling others and how to have a productive conversation to help others. Preorder your copy of Perfectly Queer here and see why Good Morning America included it on their 15 Spring Reads list: 15 delightful books perfect for spring reading - Good Morning America .   Connect With Us: For questions, comments, and more email: LifeAndLoveIntheQ@gmail.com  Schedule a counseling session with Dr. Treisha at https://calendly.com/treishapeterson/60min Schedule a support session with Jillian Abby at https://calendly.com/jillianabby/lgbtqiasupport More from Treisha Peterson, PhD: https://linktr.ee/treishapeterson More from Jillian Abby: https://linktr.ee/jillianabby Join our Patreon for as low as $5/month: https://www.patreon.com/user?u=87183097  

This is Part 3 of a month-long series diving into Jill's new book from Hay House Publishing, Perfectly Queer. This episode is about trauma and whether or not the experience of "coming out LGBTQ" is a traumatic experience. Treisha shares her definition of trauma and the tools we can use to move through challenging events in our lives. You can preorder Perfectly Queer in the US, UK, and Canada at most major retailers (and most indie bookshops can order it for you if they don't have it in stock). Find order links at QueerAbby.com/book and submit your email to download a free unpublished chapter. Connect With Us: For questions, comments, and more email: LifeAndLoveIntheQ@gmail.com  Join our Patreon for as low as $5/month: https://www.patreon.com/user?u=87183097 Schedule a counseling session with Dr. Treisha at https://calendly.com/treishapeterson/60min Schedule a support session with Jillian Abby at https://calendly.com/jillianabby/lgbtqiasupport More from Treisha Peterson, PhD: https://linktr.ee/treishapeterson More from Jillian Abby: https://linktr.ee/jillianabby

This is Part 2 of our monthly chat about Jill's memoir Perfectly Queer. In this episode we continue the discussion of compulsory heterosexuality and how that showed up in a moment between high-school-age Jill and her mom. Jill also discusses how she climbed to the top of "Supposed To" mountain (a theme Treisha and many others can relate to in their own life). Have questions? Reach out to us at LifeAndLoveInTheQ@gmail.com. You can order your copy of Perfectly Queer here. Connect With Us: For questions, comments, and more email: LifeAndLoveIntheQ@gmail.com  Schedule a counseling session with Dr. Treisha at https://calendly.com/treishapeterson/60min Schedule a support session with Jillian Abby at https://calendly.com/jillianabby/lgbtqiasupport More from Treisha Peterson, PhD: https://linktr.ee/treishapeterson More from Jillian Abby: https://linktr.ee/jillianabbyJoin our Patreon for as low as $5/month: https://www.patreon.com/user?u=87183097

This is Part 1 of a month-long series diving into Jill's new book from Hay House Publishing, Perfectly Queer. This episode dives into: 1. Who exactly this book is for (hint: it's not JUST for the LGBTQ+). 2. Why Jill wanted "Queer" as part of the title. 3. What is Compulsory Heterosexuality, how did it impact Jill's awareness of her identity, and how is it showing up in Florida and elsewhere today. 4. How Jill started to realize that what she was "supposed to" do wasn't aligned with who she was and what she dreamed of in her life.  You can preorder Perfectly Queer in the US, UK, and Canada at most major retailers (and most indie bookshops can order it for you if they don't have it in stock). Find order links at QueerAbby.com/book and submit your email to download a free unpublished chapter. Connect With Us: For questions, comments, and more email: LifeAndLoveIntheQ@gmail.com  Join our Patreon for as low as $5/month: https://www.patreon.com/user?u=87183097 Schedule a counseling session with Dr. Treisha at https://calendly.com/treishapeterson/60min Schedule a support session with Jillian Abby at https://calendly.com/jillianabby/lgbtqiasupport More from Treisha Peterson, PhD: https://linktr.ee/treishapeterson More from Jillian Abby: https://linktr.ee/jillianabby