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  Marriage Therapist and Author Dr. John Gottman has identified 4 kinds of negativity, if allowed to grow and fester, would be extremely lethal to a relationship: criticism, contempt, defensiveness and stonewalling. Listen to today’s podcast where we talk about the 4 Horsemen of the Apocalypse. This concludes the Middle Years of Marriage Series. Remember to adopt the right attitude within. Practice gratitude, forgiveness and charity and your spaceship will soar to great heights.

What does your spouse do that bothers you? Today’s show might surprise you as we focus on YOU rather than what you think your spouse does that irritates you. Where do these irritations originate? What is the source of these irritations? What bothered you when you first got married and no longer bothers you? Why did this change? What did you do? We’re going to dissect irritations and how you can manage them. The first point we need to make is that irritations come in many forms and intensities. Irritations have to do with your expectations.

Do’s and Don’ts for the Middle Years and Beyond:   Don’t be a complainer. Don’t neglect each other. Don’t deceive or lie. Don’t put excessive energy into your past or future and instead, live in the present – that’s all we’ve got. Do make your home a sanctuary, speak kindly to each other, bring pleasure to your partner, cultivate a proper temper and feed the heart.

Middle Age Malaise doesn’t have to creep into your marriage if you know what to look for and how to address important areas of your relationship. What are crucial things to look for? Boredom, neglecting the concept of LOVE MAPS – or sharing your inner world with your spouse, the importance of having a passion and shared goals. Today’s episode is the first in a 4-part series on the Middle Years of Marriage.

“What therefore God has joined together, let no man put asunder.” (Matthew 19:4-6). A happy marriage usually contains happy people, better physical and mental health and a higher level of wealth. Author Steve Bollman (“The Choice Wine: 7 Steps to a Superabundant Marriage”) says if you follow the 7 steps, your marriage will have a foretaste of paradise. The last chapter ties everything together and Bollman explains how the steps parallel the holy family. He says God wished to give couples the superabundant joy that was experienced by man and woman in paradise. He doesn’t want us to have sufficiency, but superabundance – to truly thrive. Here are the 7 steps: honor your wedding vows, use money for other people, give God some of your time, set your mind on things above, find God in yourself, find God in other people, make it easy to be good and hard to be bad.

In “Three to Get Married,” Fulton Sheen addresses the longings in our hearts, the imperfections of relationships, the relationship between man and God, and husband and wife. As you might have guessed in the title, it takes a husband, wife, and God to make a marriage profound and meaningful.

What is mature love? What is responsible love? Is chastity necessary in marriage? What about contraception? Is it harmful to marriage? If yes, how so? What are Pope John Paul II’s views on children and family? Listen to today’s podcast episode and discover some interesting viewpoints that run counter to our culture, but can bring great joy to marriage. We will review Edward Sri’s “Men, Women and the Mystery of Love: Practical Insights from John Paul II’s ‘Love and Responsibility.’ “

Although “Male and Female He Created Them” was written in 2003, it’s a book worth reading. From the history of marriage to marriage as a sacrament, there’s so much in this book that shows the beauty of marriage.  I like how this book states plainly and clearly the reasons behind such topics as chastity, love, the indissolubility of marriage and many other topics. Here’s a question to ask: “Do I think about my duty to be for my spouse a support in his sanctification or his or her search for God?” Listen to today’s podcast for a good look at “Male and Female He Created Them” on Marriage and the Family, by Jorge Cardinal Medina Estevez

“Marriage: A Path to Sanctity,” by Javier Abad and Eugenio Fenoy The sacrament of matrimony gives couples lasting strength to fulfill their duties as spouse and parent. Do you want a life filled with faith, hope and love? Than all you have to do is surrender with a cheerful heart, set aside your ego, and respect natural law. You have a higher probability for blissful harmony if you adhere to fidelity in marriage. Today’s podcast is a summary of this insightful book.

Covenanted Happiness: Love and Commitment in Marriage by Cormac Burke. There are certain rules that couples can follow and this book explains why we get into predicaments and encounter unhappiness and demise in marriage. Love is other-centered, not self-centered. “A married love that is fully human is a compound of sense and spirit.” A beautiful book with challenging concepts.

Nonviolent Communication is a way to create peace and calm in the home. Who wouldn’t want to make a connection in a way that everybody’s needs get met through natural giving? Listen to today’s podcast and discover the process of nonviolent communication, when the speaker cites an observation, feeling, need and request. For more information, look up Dr. Marshall Rosenberg and www.cnvc.org.

Arguments. We all have them. Sometimes disagreements can bring us down and keep us down. Some people say, “Don’t sweat the small stuff,” but it is said that the little things can do damage to a marriage – especially if those so called little things are left unsolved or unattended. A wall of resentment can build due to the little things. It’s much harder to demolish a brick wall, so let’s try to not build that wall in the first place and deal with conflict as it arises. Today, we are going to discover some secrets to dealing with conflict.

Are you a good listener?  How do you know?  Find out what it takes to be a good listener and how to go about listening for meaning.  If you aren’t a good listener, chances are, you are not in tune with your spouse.

This is part 1 in a 4-part series on communication. Today’s episode will explore why we have breakdowns and what we can do about it. There are many ways we can ensure effective communication.

In this final part of our 6-part series on Emotional Fidelity, we discuss what you can do to repair and rebuild a relationship that has been rocked by a sexual and emotional affair. It will take time, vulnerability and reconnection to start anew. What else? Listen to today’s episode for guidance and suggestions.

Monogamy. Are We Kidding Ourselves? Find out why cheating is common, the 3 main reasons we cheat, and what we can do to prevent against it happening to us.

Pornography is contributing to a breakdown in love and marriage.  People who regularly view pornography have a 300% increase in having an affair or hookup outside marriage. It is negatively influencing the way humans perceive and relate to each other. Pornography isn’t just an art form or harmless individual freedom, it’s the portrayal of explicit sexual subject matter for the purposes of sexual excitement and erotic satisfaction, minus love or mature relationships. Porn is disrespectful of women.  It brings with it tremendous consequences that shouldn’t be overlooked. We’ll talk about those devastating consequences on today’s episode, episode 4 of the 6-Part Series “Emotional Fidelity.”  

Emotional Infidelity is a silent killer. How can you guard against Emotional Infidelity? There are at least 8 ways. Can you name some? Here are 2: (1) Commit to love as a decision, not a feeling. (2) Don’t put energy into the past. You must continuously tend to the garden of your relationship lest it become overwrought with weeds. There are many ways in which to ensure the emotional health of your marriage. Find out on today’s episode. This is episode 3 of 6 in the Emotional Fidelity Series. Subscribe to Your Marriage Matters Podcast on your favorite platform.

Secrets to mastering emotional well-being. Emotional health in marriage means developing a high degree of self-awareness. It means seeking a balance or control when emotions are strong. Emotional health means taking responsibility and not blaming or burdening others. What else can we do to increase emotional health in marriage?  Today is Part 2 of a 6-Part Series.

What are the most common emotional needs we all have and how do we go about fulfilling those needs? Find out the 10 secrets to a great relationship and see how you measure up.