The Divorce Support Podcast

Life after divorce can feel confusing and heavy—not just because the relationship ended, but because your nervous system and your mind can get stuck in a repeating loop: overwhelm → numbness → rumination → panic → reactivity. In this episode, we break down what's actually happening in that "Divorce Doom Loop," why it's so common in the weeks and months after a breakup or divorce, and how it quietly impacts everything else—your decisions, your energy, your work, your health, and even the legal and financial complexity of the divorce itself. You'll also learn a simple "dashboard" framework for understanding the four pillars of divorce (emotional, legal, financial, and parenting if kids are involved), and why turning down the emotional dial reduces the strain on the other pillars. If you've ever thought, "Why am I still feeling this?" we'll talk about why grief and anger don't disappear when paperwork is signed—and what it actually takes for those emotions to loosen their grip. Next step: If you want clarity instead of guessing, take our free self-test to measure where you are right now across Relationships, Identity, Feelings, and Thoughts—and use it as a scorecard to track real progress over time. Free Self-Test: https://rebuilders.net/self-test-ers?utm_source=lifeafterdivorce_podcast

When a relationship ends, people are told a lot of things: "Just give it time," "stay busy," "be strong," "you'll get over it." But if you've been through divorce—or supported someone who has—you know that advice often falls flat. In this episode, we take a clear, grounded look at how people actually experience divorce, where they tend to look for help, and why so many well-meaning solutions miss the mark. We talk about the invisible emotional load of divorce, the difference between being "functional" and being truly okay, and why structure and support matter more than willpower. You'll learn: Why divorce affects sleep, focus, and decision-making even when people "seem fine" Where people most often turn for help—and why those paths don't always work The myths that keep people stuck longer than necessary What real recovery looks like (and what it isn't) How to think about healing in a way that's practical, measurable, and humane Whether you're going through a divorce yourself, supporting someone who is, or simply trying to understand what actually helps during one of life's hardest transitions, this conversation will give you a clearer map forward. Take the Self Test here

*]:pointer-events-auto scroll-mt-[calc(var(--header-height)+min(200px,max(70px,20svh)))]" dir="auto" tabindex="-1" data-turn-id= "5154c09f-31bf-41cc-9d8b-fd826b0472f3" data-testid= "conversation-turn-20" data-scroll-anchor="true" data-turn= "assistant"> When someone you care about is going through divorce or separation, you might feel stuck. You want to help—but you're afraid of saying the wrong thing, taking the wrong side, or making it worse. In this episode, Kevin from Rebuilders International shares what actually helps, based on what people in our programs say they need most from friends and family. You'll learn why divorce is like an emotional broken leg, why unsolicited advice usually backfires, and how to replace "why" questions with "what" questions that feel supportive instead of judgmental. You'll also get simple, copy-and-paste check-ins that work better than "How are you?", plus the 7 best things you can do to help someone feel less alone while they heal. Educational only. Not therapy or legal advice. Learn more at Rebuilders.net.

Anger after divorce can feel justified—and still destroy your sleep, health, focus, and relationships. In this episode, we break down what anger really is, what it's protecting, and how to release it so it doesn't harden into resentment. You'll learn: Why anger is "like drinking poison hoping the other person will die" Why releasing anger is not the same thing as forgiveness How anger often protects deeper feelings like hurt, fear, shame, and grief The difference between current anger and past (stored) anger Why the goal isn't to be nice—the goal is to be free Next step: If you want a clear baseline of where you are right now, take the self-test: https://rebuilders.net/self-test Watch the full video version: youtu.be/5U0GfEKUBxY Get the Workbook at Amazon here: Rebuilders Workbook on Amazon As an Amazon Associate we earn from qualifying purchases. This small amount doesn't change anything for you it just helps us support the podcast.

In this episoe we cover the most common symptom of an unhealthy relationship - codependency. Many people assume that this is the way we SHOULD do it. It can be subtle, it can creep in and overtake our relationship. In fact, many relationships start out healthy and become more and more codependent as time goes on. When they do, we don't know how to get out of them. In this episode we discuss what it is, what behaviors reveal codependency, WHY we are codependent, and how to do it differently next time.

In this episoe we cover the most common symptom of an unhealthy relationship - codependency.  Many people assume that this is the way we SHOULD do it. It can be subtle, it can creep in and overtake our relationship. In fact, many relationships start out healthy and become more and more codependent as time goes on. When they do, we don't know how to get out of them. In this episode we discuss what it is, what behaviors reveal codependency, WHY we are codependent, and how to do it differently next time. 

Are you struggling to move forward after your divorce? Whether you're drowning in therapy bills or searching for a new start, this episode is a beacon of hope. Join us as we dive into the pivotal discussion of therapy versus coaching in the journey of post-divorce recovery. Today, we explore the nuances between these two pathways with insights from both professionals and those who've walked this path. We'll uncover the types of therapy that genuinely work, what to look for in a therapist, and when it might be time to switch to a coach. Inspired by a profound discussion with a recent graduate of our 10-week program—a therapist herself—we delve into effective therapies like Internal Family Systems and the transformative power of group coaching. From tackling the shadows of deep emotional wounds to embracing transformation through strategic coaching, we'll guide you on how to choose the best approach for your unique situation. This isn't just about recovery; it's about rebuilding a life you love. Tune in to discover why sometimes, the right voice at the right time can turn the tide of your entire post-divorce journey. Don't miss this in-depth exploration that could redefine the path to your healing and growth.

Are you struggling to move forward after your divorce? Whether you’re drowning in therapy bills or searching for a new start, this episode is a beacon of hope. Join us as we dive into the pivotal discussion of therapy versus coaching in the journey of post-divorce recovery. Today, we explore the nuances between these two pathways with insights from both professionals and those who’ve walked this path. We'll uncover the types of therapy that genuinely work, what to look for in a therapist, and when it might be time to switch to a coach. Inspired by a profound discussion with a recent graduate of our 10-week program—a therapist herself—we delve into effective therapies like Internal Family Systems and the transformative power of group coaching. From tackling the shadows of deep emotional wounds to embracing transformation through strategic coaching, we’ll guide you on how to choose the best approach for your unique situation. This isn’t just about recovery; it’s about rebuilding a life you love. Tune in to discover why sometimes, the right voice at the right time can turn the tide of your entire post-divorce journey. Don't miss this in-depth exploration that could redefine the path to your healing and growth.

In this episode of our deeply engaging podcast, we delve into the heart of post-divorce healing, addressing the profound yet often "Unanswerable Questions" that haunt those navigating the turbulent waters of separation. With an empathetic and expert touch, we explore the common queries that persist in the minds of those seeking closure and understanding - questions about personal responsibility, the actions of others, and the myriad possibilities of 'what could have been.' Yet, as our host skillfully reveals, the true journey lies not in the quest for answers, but in understanding the deeper currents of emotion and thought patterns that drive these questions. From denial to fear, grief to loneliness, and self-limiting beliefs to low self-esteem, we uncover the complex emotional landscape that can trap individuals in a cycle of rumination and pain. Through insightful analysis and compassionate advice, we illuminate the path to recognizing and overcoming the underlying issues that prevent healing, emphasizing the transformative power of acceptance, self-care, and personal growth. Moreover, the episode shines a light on the unparalleled support and solidarity found within divorce recovery groups, illustrating how communal healing can provide clarity, foster resilience, and nurture new beginnings. Whether you're grappling with the sting of anger, the shadow of loneliness, or the weight of self-doubt, this episode offers a beacon of hope and a roadmap to recovery. Join us for a journey of self-discovery, healing, and empowerment, as we navigate the "Unanswerable Questions" together, finding strength in shared experiences and the courage to move forward. This isn't just a podcast; it's a lifeline for those seeking to reclaim their lives after divorce. Tune in, and let's embark on this healing journey together.

In this episode of our deeply engaging podcast, we delve into the heart of post-divorce healing, addressing the profound yet often "Unanswerable Questions" that haunt those navigating the turbulent waters of separation. With an empathetic and expert touch, we explore the common queries that persist in the minds of those seeking closure and understanding - questions about personal responsibility, the actions of others, and the myriad possibilities of 'what could have been.' Yet, as our host skillfully reveals, the true journey lies not in the quest for answers, but in understanding the deeper currents of emotion and thought patterns that drive these questions.  From denial to fear, grief to loneliness, and self-limiting beliefs to low self-esteem, we uncover the complex emotional landscape that can trap individuals in a cycle of rumination and pain. Through insightful analysis and compassionate advice, we illuminate the path to recognizing and overcoming the underlying issues that prevent healing, emphasizing the transformative power of acceptance, self-care, and personal growth. Moreover, the episode shines a light on the unparalleled support and solidarity found within divorce recovery groups, illustrating how communal healing can provide clarity, foster resilience, and nurture new beginnings. Whether you're grappling with the sting of anger, the shadow of loneliness, or the weight of self-doubt, this episode offers a beacon of hope and a roadmap to recovery. Join us for a journey of self-discovery, healing, and empowerment, as we navigate the "Unanswerable Questions" together, finding strength in shared experiences and the courage to move forward. This isn't just a podcast; it's a lifeline for those seeking to reclaim their lives after divorce. Tune in, and let's embark on this healing journey together.

Divorce IS conflict. It is based on fundamental disagreements and disconnection. In this episode, Kevin talks about the 6 levels of a disagreement and how to repair it. He also discusses the difference between being reactive and being responsive. Finally he shares one way to actually repair a wound in the relationship. The ramifications of being able to better communicate and come to an agreement can translate into THOUSANDS of dollars. Learning to rise above our immediate instincts gives us power to better navigate potential conflict. Listen to this episode to learn more how to navigate conflict gracefully.

Divorce IS conflict. It is based on fundamental disagreements and disconnection. In this episode, Kevin talks about the 6 levels of a disagreement and how to repair it. He also discusses the difference between being reactive and being responsive. Finally he shares one way to actually repair a wound in the relationship. The ramifications of being able to better communicate and come to an agreement can translate into THOUSANDS of dollars.  Learning to rise above our immediate instincts gives us power to better navigate potential conflict.  Listen to this episode to learn more how to navigate conflict gracefully. 

There are a LOT of Divorce Support Groups out there. It is where a lot of people go when they are feeling isolated and struggling to process what is happening to them. I know. I run one. And yet I see that Divorce Support Groups are NOT what people really need, usually. In this episode I explain the characteristics of a Support Group and why you should avoid them. Or if you do want one, then set your expectations of what it really will be like. The problem for most people is that they join a support group and it doesn't really give them what they really need and they give up. They assume that this is just the way it is. I don't want that for you. I want you to get the right KIND of support. If after listening to this episode you want to join our Support Group for 3 months for free you can do that here: https://go2.rebuilders.net/sg-information

There are a LOT of Divorce Support Groups out there. It is where a lot of people go when they are feeling isolated and struggling to process what is happening to them.  I know. I run one. And yet I see that Divorce Support Groups are NOT what people really need, usually.  In this episode I explain the characteristics of a Support Group and why you should avoid them. Or if you do want one, then set your expectations of what it really will be like.  The problem for most people is that they join a support group and it doesn't really give them what they really need and they give up. They assume that this is just the way it is.  I don't want that for you. I want you to get the right KIND of support.  If after listening to this episode you want to join our Support Group for 3 months for free you can do that here: https://go2.rebuilders.net/sg-information  

The Power Within: Unleashing Your Mindset Superhero This is one of THE most important concepts that we teach. When people really get it and integrate it into their lives they are never the same. They walk among the wise. They see themselves and others differently. They are responsive and not reactive. Acceptance of themsleves and others is a part of their daily lives. There is peace within. I kid you not. I know because I lived my life like Henry David Thoroeau said, "Living a life of quiet desperation". Now, I can "be". I see Victim Consciousness everywhere (see the last episode). And I have an alternative. This is what I share in this episode. I hope you like it. I have literally spent the last 5 years integrating it into my life. When people go through our 10-week classes they see how this works and begin to also incorporate it into their lives. This is why we see such massive results. It's just one of the magical things we do in our courses. Love ya! Talk to you soon! (When you take the self test and book a call with me) :) Kevin

The Power Within: Unleashing Your Mindset Superhero This is one of THE most important concepts that we teach. When people really get it and integrate it into their lives they are never the same. They walk among the wise. They see themselves and others differently. They are responsive and not reactive. Acceptance of themsleves and others is a part of their daily lives. There is peace within.  I kid you not.  I know because I lived my life like Henry David Thoroeau said, "Living a life of quiet desperation". Now, I can "be". I see Victim Consciousness everywhere (see the last episode). And I have an alternative. This is what I share in this episode.  I hope you like it. I have literally spent the last 5 years integrating it into my life. When people go through our 10-week classes they see how this works and begin to also incorporate it into their lives. This is why we see such massive results. It's just one of the magical things we do in our courses.  Love ya! Talk to you soon! (When you take the self test and book a call with me) :) Kevin

This episode is from a video that was created for a presentation. You can see the visuals at our Rebuilders site at https://go2.rebuilders.net/drama-triangle-part-1 In this episode Kevin explores Relationship Dynamics, the Karpman Triangle (the Drama Triangle) and how this leads to Victim Consciousness. Understanding what it is often allows people to see how their underlying beliefs have created a lifetime of dissatisfaction. People in our classes often begin to see over the 10-weeks how this plays out in their relationships, their lives, and how important it is to learn the alternative consciousness. It also reveals WHY their Ex is behaving they way they are. THEY are in Victim Consciousness too!

This episode is from a video that was created for a presentation. You can see the visuals at our Rebuilders site at https://go2.rebuilders.net/drama-triangle-part-1 In this episode Kevin explores Relationship Dynamics, the Karpman Triangle (the Drama Triangle) and how this leads to Victim Consciousness. Understanding what it is often allows people to see how their underlying beliefs have created a lifetime of dissatisfaction.  People in our classes often begin to see over the 10-weeks how this plays out in their relationships, their lives, and how important it is to learn the alternative consciousness.  It also reveals WHY their Ex is behaving they way they are. THEY are in Victim Consciousness too!

In this episode, we shift gears a little - we hear from Kathy a person that tried a lot of different things to recover from her divorce. She shares some things that worked and some things that didn't. Since then she has become a certified Facilitator for the Fisher Rebuilding Seminar™ in Cincinnati Ohio.

In this episode, we shift gears a little - we hear from Kathy a person that tried a lot of different things to recover from her divorce. She shares some things that worked and some things that didn't. Since then she has become a certified Facilitator for the Fisher Rebuilding Seminar™ in Cincinnati Ohio.