The Femme Focus

So I have a question for you femmes: You do know that it’s okay to start over…right? Or that everything doesn’t have to be done so perfectly within the first month of a New Year…right? I hope so! I titled this podcast, “Drive Slow Homie” as a reminder to everyone who is taking 2017 on at full speed. More power to you, BUT, take your time to smell the roses; and make some mistakes along the way. Just because your pace may be slower than others, doesn’t mean you aren’t making progress!   Discussion Points: 2016 Wrap Up Goals for 2017: Personal & Professional Yesterday is gone. Tomorrow has not yet come. We have only today. Let us begin. Happy Listening! ?Xo   || Subscribe Below ||

Hi Femmes! In this last and final episode of Collaborative Thoughts, we chat with Marsha of The Finance Bar (@thefinancebar) for pt. 3 of the Crisis Change vs. Lifestyle Change series. Marsha is Certified Financial Educator and Founder of “Financial Empowerment Charlotte.” In this episode we address the importance of financial readiness! Marsha has over 12 years of finance and facilitation experience including undergraduate and graduate degrees in Management & Leadership. (For more information on Marsha Barnes, visit: thefinancebar.com) Discussion Points: What is the difference between “crisis change” and “lifestyle change?” (Dylesia) How does this apply to my finances? (Marsha) How does changing only for a certain result versus changing permanently affect my long-term financial goals? What am I missing out on my doing this? (Dorian) Were you ever inconsistent with your finances? What happened to make you decide to make financial stability a lifestyle? What personal examples can you give so that I can better understand the contrast between how your life was then and how it is now that you’ve actually committed to living a financially stable life? (Marsha) I’m ready to commit, so what steps can I take to transition from inconsistency to consistency? (Marsha) When you are really ready for change, you will start to see a feel a shift within yourself. Happy Listening! ?Xo ||Subscribe Below||

Happy New Year, Femmes! What better way to start off a new beginning, then with some fitness fuel to feed your mind? In part 2 of the of the Collaborative Thoughts: Crisis Change vs. Lifestyle Change series, we share information with Deanna Taylor (@dtaylor.bc). DeAnna is a NASM certified personal trainer who struggled with obesity from childhood through 2010, when she set out to become healthier, losing 85 pounds and founding “Taylored Fitness Charlotte, LLC.” DeAnna’s weight loss story has been featured on several local news stations and newspapers as well as with the Huffington Post. (For more information on Deanna Taylor, visit: broke-and-abroad.com *Deanna is also a travel blogger*) Discussion Points: What is the difference between “crisis change” and “lifestyle change?” (Dorian) How does this apply to fitness? How did you discover that this would be a lifestyle change for you?  (DeAnna) How does changing only for a certain result versus changing permanently affect my health? What am I missing out on my doing this? (Dylesia) Were you ever inconsistent with your faith? What personal examples can you give so that I can better understand the contrast between how your life was then and how it is now that you’ve actually committed to living a healthier lifestyle? (Dorian) I’m ready to commit, so what steps can I take to transition from inconsistency to consistency? (DeAnna) Consistency is KEY! Happy Listening! ?Xo ||Subscribe Below||  

Hi Femmes! The series, titled “Crisis Change vs. Lifestyle Change” focuses on faith, finances, and fitness, three areas that tend to be overlooked in all but crisis situations. With this series, we have engaged in honest subjective and objective observations. We have also recognized the need for a platform to share information on how to commit to lifestyle changes in these areas rather than situational changes, which ultimately lead us right back to the situations we were seeking to change. During this episode, we collaborate with Vernon Gordon on the subject of faith. Listen as we discuss to committing to lifestyle changes (permanent), rather than just changes in times of crisis (temporary). (For more information on Vernon Gordon, visit: www.vernongordon.com) Discussion Points: What is the difference between “crisis change” and “lifestyle change?” (Dorian) How does this apply to faith? And what does the Bible say about this? (Vernon) How does changing only for a certain result versus changing permanently affect my relationship with GOD? What am I missing out on by doing this? (Dylesia) Were you ever inconsistent with your faith? (Dorian) What personal examples can you give so that I can better understand the contrast between how your life was then and how it is now that you’ve actually committed to HIM? (Dorian) I’m ready to commit, so what steps can I take to transition from inconsistency to consistency? (Vernon) Are you living based on miracles or on discipline? Happy Listening! ?Xo ||Subscribe Below||

Hi Femmes! Question! So, what’s this new obsession with the phrase “doing too much?” …and why is it made out to be such a bad thing? …and what do I do when because of my commitment to success, it’s used in reference to me? In this episode of Collaborative Thoughts, titled,“It’s Hard Being The One Who Made It,” we hear from three women committed to “doing too much” in spite of what others think. If you find yourself finding it hard to transition to your next level because of those around you, check out this episode of the podcast. For this episode, the guest collaborator was Christina Kanu, Director of Communication & Community Relations for Bonfire Impact, co-facilitator for The Dream Academy, Clark Atlanta Master’s of African American Studies scholar, and self-titled leadership expert. Discussion Points: “Doing Too Much”  What is it? Why do others seem to think it’s such a negative attribute? How do I know I’m called to be great? Christina’s Story At what point did you know you were different? (Christina’s perspective) How do I handle the call on my life? (Dorian’s perspective) How do I handle others being unable to handle the call on my life? (Christina’s perspective) What if I know I’m called but I’m not willing to be set apart? (Dylesia’s perspective) Examples of “Greats” throughout history Their story How he/she resisted the pressure to be like every one else The outcome of his/her resistance What can we learn from him/her? Often times people will be able to identify your talent, but that doesn’t mean they will be able to identify your purpose. ?Xo, Happy Listening! || subscribe below ||

Hi Femmes! We often attribute happiness to things…people…and places. We rarely think about it solely based on ourselves. It’s the choices we make that hinder that happiness. This podcast is for those who are tired of going in circles and tired of making the same mistakes. I decided to title this podcast “Wanna Be Happy” because a lot of times in life there are many things that are out of our control, but happiness is one thing that we possess every single bit of power OVER. Discussion Points: Get out of your own way! Understand WHO you are Understand the parts of you that you don’t like Live in your TRUTH Are you addicted to the pain? Doing things over and over that consistently bring u pain Allowing others to come and go as they please Making decisions that don’t have our best interest in mind   If you keep on giving your heart for people to tear apart, the healing will never start. Happy Listening!! ?Xo || Subscribe Below ||

Hi Femmes! Loneliness is a TOUGH pill to swallow, especially when we reject taking it! BUT, what is loneliness? Is it punishment for not being good enough to deserve the company of others? OR it is an opportunity for uninterrupted development? On this call we had the privilege of having guest collaborator, Shannah Burden join in on the discussion. This call is not only designed to impact those who lack companionship or are recovering from beak-ups, but those who experience periods of loneliness due to extended and/or irregular distance from loved ones, those who are grieving the death of a loved one, AND/OR those who have recently relocated or graduated and have yet to build stable social circles. (Shannah’s contact info: @novalidationneeded; http://www.novalidationneeded.com) Discussion Points: Topic Overview  Coping with Loneliness What is loneliness? How do I change the way I think about loneliness? Effective coping mechanisms for… Loneliness due to break-ups (Dorian) When everyone around me has a significant other, but I don’t (Shannah) Loneliness due to death (Dorian) Loneliness due to relocation for life transitions (Dylesia) When I’m surrounded by people but feel misunderstood (Shannah) Loneliness due to a loved one’s career/lifestyle (Dylesia) Push yourself to explore your individual IDENTITY. Happy Listening! ?Xo || Subscribe Below ||

Happy Friday Femmes! Ahhhh yes, finally another Podcast is up! This is certainly one of my favorite Collaborative Thoughts calls! At the time of the call, (last year, and ironically, this exact month) I remember that I was in a place in my life where I no longer felt the need to “broadcast” certain aspects of my life for social media. I wanted to protect my pearls! In this call, we discuss the correlation between privacy, discretion, and validation. The topic is derived from Matthew 7:6 –” Do not give dogs what is sacred; do not throw your pearls to pigs. If you do, they may trample them under their feet, and turn and tear you to pieces.” Discussion Points: Dylesia’s Perspective Not throwing things of value to people who are sloppy and messy Your THIRD STRAND has to be God! (You + ____ + GOD) Create a VIP relationship with God Dorian’s Perspective Discern WHO you give particular information to (outsiders don’t always belong in) Discretion is the derivative of mature happiness Feed the people you love, give your issues to God You must exchange whispers with God before shouts with the world. ?Xo, Happy Listening! || subscribe below ||

Happy Monday, Femmes! A vision, dream, thought, or desire is given to each of us for a particular reason. No one can take that from you and no one can duplicate what has been placed upon your heart. When it’s there, it’s there for a reason! This podcast is titled, “Push It Real Good” for that exact reason! PUSH that vision, that dream, that thought and that desire REAL GOOD! Discussion Points: No one can see your GOD GIVEN vision God didn’t give it to anyone else to understand or approve of Write the vision, make it plain Never be afraid of your own greatness Don’t wait before it’s too late If you have the time to pursue the vision now, DO IT! Waiting may cause a halt in your vision Do what you need to do to get the ball rolling Be a “what now?” not a “what if?” person! ‘WHAT NOW’ allows creativity, ‘WHAT IF’ stifles creaitivity You can’t do anything with a what if approach Fulfillment of vision leads to success WAKE UP on your God given vision! ?Xo, Happy Listening! || subscribe Below ||

Happy Monday Femmes! What is it that your happiness always seems to make someone else mad?! On this empowerment call, we discussed how to pursue, maintain, and restore happiness as well as how to identify and handle those who are displeased with yours. Discussion Points: Topic Overview The Pursuit of Happiness! How is happiness achieved? How do you keep it? How is it recovered when it is lost? How do I identify people who aren’t happy with my happiness? Being aware of those you choose to keep around you Recognizing your feelings Keen discernment Happiness should never be tied to people or things because they are ever fleeting. Happy Listening! ?Xo || Subscribe Below ||

Hi Femmes! Happy Sunday This podcast is titled, “You Gots To Chill,” because sometimes, we have to recognize when that is exactly what we need to do. Take the time to really let a dream manifest itself before presenting it to the world. Be precise, proactive, and persistent in what it is you desire to do. But remember, just because the world doesn’t know what’s taking place behind the scenes, doesn’t mean it isn’t happening. Discussion Points: Pace Yourself: Rome wasn’t built in a day Improper execution causes anxiety and frustration Work on it in phases Think Of ALL Your Other Priorities: Don’t put previous dreams and desires on the back burner Finish what you started and then move to the next Fulfillment often occurs in future tense The Idea Is YOURS: What God has for you it is for you!  Keep it in your ‘dream bank’ A dream deferred is STILL a dream As we do with life’s journey, trust the process of a dream   Have the time to put in to what you put out. Happy Listening!! ?Xo, || Subscribe Below ||

Hi Femmes! This Collaborative Thoughts Podcast titled, “Stay In Your Lane” speaks to exactly what the title states. Staying in your lane can be difficult when so many people seem to be speeding past you…especially when those people are eager to share their opinions about what you should be doing and where you should be headed. In this podcast, we share our personal experiences while focusing on our goals in the midst of everyone else’s’ and provide you with insight on how to do the same. Discussion Points: Topic Overview Dylesia’s Perspective Ignoring the opinions of those around you Focusing on what God has for you to do Be TRUE to yourself (not based on your age, your experience, etc.) Dorian’s Perspective Going fast but not going anywhere at all Not honing in on your potential (get out of the slow lane!) Merging across a three lane highway (stick with something and FINISH it.) How Do They Collide? “Drifting over in what you used to do, when your calling in the present is not where you used to be.” Happy Listening! ?Xo || Subscribe Below ||

Hi Femmes! I decided to call this Podcast, “Started From The Bottom.” Why? Well, you’ll just have to listen to find out! In this episode I am certainly being more transparent about my education and where it has taken me in my career path. Discussion Points: My Educational Background Educational history Job history The effects of moving from one sector to another Overqualified and Overeducated  Humbling moment(s) Do it to the FULLEST Show yourself approved Title Means NOTHING ‘Step Stools’ to success Stay focused on your goal(s) It’s only temporary Go into it gracefully, thankfully, and in a manner that shows your purpose. Happy Listening! ?Xo || Subscribe Below ||

What does word enough mean to you? When you think about it, do you see yourself as being enough? In this episode of ‘Collaborative Thoughts’, we explore the meaning of being ‘enough’ and how we correlate being enough to ourselves and the world around us. Discussion Points: How We Look At God Scripture(s): Psalm 139:14; II Corinthians 12:9 Proverbs 31 (The Proverbs 31 Woman) What We Think Is What WE ARE The Effect That Failing To View Ourselves As Enough Has On: Ourselves Our Relationships Our Faith Our Future Comparison vs. Individuality What is Individuality? What is Comparison? Self-Reflection How To Stay In Your Own Lane Happy Listening! ?Xo || Subscribe Below ||

Hello! Finally, I have released my very own FIRST Podcast! Yay, how exciting?! Thank you for deciding to take a listen. I promise, you’ll enjoy! I decided to title this episode “COMEBACK SEASON” because I believe that after recovering from failure(s) we have to keep some things in mind in order enter into our comeback season stronger than ever! Discussion Points: The True Meaning of Failure Refusing to get back up again Letting fear have the final say Others do not determine your fate Perception What is it we perceive as failure? Is our perception true? Our cognitions control us! Success Is Bred Upon A Failed Attempt In order to succeed one must experience failure Failed attempts are one step closer to success Continuously feed your passion in spite of failing There is nothing more precious than self-trust!  Happy Listening!! ?Xo || Subscribe Below ||

Hello Hello! I hope your Monday is going swell So, here it is! I will be releasing all of the ‘Collaborative Thoughts’ 2014 calls into a Podcast format and I’m super excited! I wanted to start with “What’s Your Motive?”. This was a topic created around Valentine’s Day, that addressed Love, Motive, Validation and Social Networking. I thought it relevant to begin with this show particularly for the beginning of any new year, we can see that validation can be the driving force for a lot of what people do regarding New Year Resolutions and New Year Goals. Guest Collaborator, Keith N. Johnson, of Nathaniel and Randolph, gave meaningful insight and perspective of the many issues we face in dealing with love. (Keith’s contact info: @nathaniel_and_randolph; www.nathanielandrandolph.etsy.com) Discussion Points: Seeking Love Male and Female Roles (common reversal of those roles) Common reasons love is sought Love as a validator Examples in Pop Culture of love being used for the wrong reasons Love and Social Networking Motives Maintaining a relationship that the public doesn’t know about (Secrecy vs. Privacy) Being Honest with Yourself Why do YOU want love? Finding validation within How to escape NEEDing a significant other Happy Listening! ?Xo || Subscribe Below ||