The Inactives NFL Podcast

Matt grills Nick on his outlook at various points throughout the fourth quarter of the Super Bowl. Nick reveals a dislike of Super Bowl goat Johnson Bademosi that predates his missed tackle of Nelson Agholor. Matt swears that THIS YEAR is the year he's gonna care less about the Seahawks. Dad updates.

Before the show, Matt and Nick agreed to avoid talking about the Super Bowl. Naturally, the first 25 and a half minutes of the program are devoted to somewhat thoughtful analysis of the Super Bowl and what teams do wrong against the Patriots (stupid Jags!). We also talk about our favorite internet sports Daves, our mutual love of Lady Bird (as well as our thoughts on some other Oscar contenders), plans for Super Bowl week, and the XFL. With special guest, Nick's 8-month-old baby.

ALL ABOARD THE JAGWAGON! Matt attempts to will a Patriots loss into being, Nick picks a fellow Nick to go to the Super Bowl, and the dads try not to scream obscenities at their children. Fun episode!

1:50 — favorite swears / on shitholes 8:30 — movie talk + more on shitholes 20:25 — Nick’s first promise that we’re about to talk football 21:45 — second promise to move on to talking about football 22:30 — Divisional round previews begin: Falcons-Eagles 31:15 — Titans-Pats, plus a sidebar requiem for the Chiefs’ meltdown 40:00 — Jaguars-Steelers 44:10 — Saints-Vikings

Your favorite football dads are back to battle the weather and talk about football. — INTRO: Snow talk & holiday review — 17:00: Moment of the season: Andy Dalton killing the Ravens’ playoff dreams on 4th and 12 — 21:10: Wild Card previews — 35:00: general playoff thoughts & WC picks

RUN OF SHOW: INTRO: Peak Stevens / Welcome to the Inactives Holiday Party 9:00 — White noise 10:00 — holiday updates from Dadtown 18:45 — Listener questions: Hiding presents, egg nog French toast, Christmas dinners, and New Years Six coaches 37:15 — Fantasy Football and the return of Aaron Rodgers 41:05 — “Fuck It and Huck It” — the new Seahawks offense 43:00 — additional fantasy tidbits 48:00 — first attempt at an outro 48:50 — Nick fires up some playoff speculation so we do that

Good thing this is an audio-only medium, because Nick looked like a POW making a recorded statement. "My five-month-old baby is treating me well..." We're off next week but will be back on December 15th. This week's topics: 1:30 — unified colors for cities' sports teams 6:30 — Decided: December 1st is the TRUE start of the Christmas season 10:30 — Holiday dad stuff 19:45 — The “It gets better” talk for Nick’s stage of dadhood 22:15 — SMOOTHIE TALK!!! 24:30 — Potty training update 27:40 — The life-dominating earworms of recenet Disney movies 32:40 — notes on Christmas shopping 38:05 — Hey, FOOTBALL! (mostly a preview of Eagles-Seahawks, but some other odds and ends)

INTRO: postmortem on the worst podcast neevr released. 10:05 — A wide-ranging Thanksgiving discussion that stretches back to Halloween candy and forward to Christmas presents. 41:40 — Week 11 preview!

DADSQUAD is a little more beaten down than usual, but they're still fighting through it to review the NFL trade deadline, and how it affects the playoff picture moving forward. 0:30 — overwhelmed dads thrashing around to tread water 8:20 — Live-in nanny or personal assistant? 15:30 — diaper pot pie 16:45 — TRADE SZN breakdown begins! 19:05 — The AJ McCarron trade that didn’t happen 25:15 — Jimmy Garoppolo to the 49ers 28:45 — The Browns are a poorly-run restaurant 33:40 — Kelvin Benjamin to the Bills 40:55 — Duane Brown to the Seahawks & Jay Ajayi to the Eagles 48ish — Playoff crystal ball action 56:55 — Tom Brady gonna get injured tho, right?

We're back with a Week 8 NFL Preview ... just as soon as we talk about everything else. — 0:30: Nick didn’t die, sorry — 5:30: You’re an idiot for listening to this podcast — 8:45: Alex Rubenstein’s Fire Sauce thumb drive — 12:15 Food mash-ups — 15:20 donut sidebar — 18:25 Halloween & kids costumes — 29:00 Nick shares his Jared Kushner story — 33:45 the fresh hell of two kids versus one — 38:00 NFL Week 8 Preview!

We have a new record! More than 43 minutes of non-football non sequiturs before we start talking about football. Enjoy. — first 3 minutes: just say what the fuck you’re drinking, Nick. — 3:05: booze corner! — 6:00: injury update (on Matt’s daughter, not any NFL players) — 7:35: So, about that World Cup… — 16:10: apple picking & bourgeois pleasures — 32:00: Matt kicked a hole in his wall like an adult + additional dadventures — 43:15: HEY! NFL TALK! — 49:20: Rams-Jaguars, plus Seahawks sidebar — 57:35: Packers-Cowboys revisited — 1:00:30: Panthers lose in real time — 1:02:30: Chargers-Raiders, feat. Giants WR digression — 1:10:15: Steelers-Chiefs

Nick forgot his laptop, so his audio will either drive you insane or make you crave Rice Krispies. Table of contents: 0:45 — hats 2:40 — Awful CBS shows 7:50 — Hugh Hefner 13:00 — kneeling during the anthem 34:00 — free speech chat finally ends 34:30 — child medical update 39:50 — Jordy Nelson owed me that touchdown 42:00 — Week 4 preview derailed by TV talk 44:30 — Week 4 preview, for real

With limited time to preview Week 3, Matt and Nick spend the first half hour chatting about booze before getting to the new slate. Episode guide: 26:42 — Matt opens a refreshing beer

Y'all, I would love to call this a Week 2 preview, but we barely touch on a couple of the biggest games. The main course today is Nick and Matt crying about their kids growing up and getting hurt. Tough week for the fellas, and not just 'cuz their teams started 0-1.

Yayyyyyy! Football's back and we've got season predictions: 3:05 — first (and only) dad-related derailment 8:00 — AFC EAST: The Patriots are Alabama with a schedule full of Vanderbilt and Kentucky 10:45 — AFC NORTH: The Steelers may be the AFC’s best hope of unseating the Pats 14:07 — AFC SOUTH: Is 5 wins for the Colts optimistic? 20:30 — AFC WEST: No friggin’ clue, man. 25:30 — NFC EAST: ¯_(?)_/¯ 31:15 — NFC NORTH: Matt Stafford is 5-46 versus winning teams, man. 36:00 — NFC SOUTH: Nick and Matt agree on everything, which means they’re definitely wrong. 40:10 — NFC WEST: Seahawks. 47:30 — Some playoff predictions

Your good, good football dads are back to talk about their fantasy crushes ahead of the 2017 season. SPOILER: Nick likes some Patriots. Listening guide: — 0:01: Intro / Nick swerves into a rant against e-sports — 5:00: Thoughts on the top 12 picks by 12 average draft position, with sidebars on the Bills’ and Chargers’ offenses — 17:55: Matt calls Tyrell Williams “Tyrell Washington” — 21:30: Thoughts on the top tier of QBs, spurred by Nick’s love for Tom Brady spurring irresponsible fantasy decisions — 26:30: the incredible value of players in the late second and third rounds — 36:00: Nick gets a phone call — 37:00: Fantasy crushes — 41:45: Matt corrects himself about the Tyrell Williams name flub — 50:00: The ghosts in Nick’s audio apps seek vengeance against his takes.

Nick opens the show by introducing us to his newborn son, who cries on air. It's audio magic! The guys discuss the nature of having a second kid before (finally, typically) getting on with the show: 15:00 — Hey, what’s the deal with Matt acting happy lately? HINT: it may have something to do with an offseason completely away from football. 20:00 — Why do fans go to training camp? Oh, and Matt hung out with Justin Timberlake, NBD. 29:40 — Lucky Whitehead, Joe Flacco, and some boring NFL-related shit 32:35 — The Rams are on "All or Nothing," and it's actually ... good? 37:30 — Matt raves about "The Defiant Ones" on HBO 41:45 — Matt and Nick respond to listener questions. Actually, it's just one question because they go off the rails talking about movies (Baby Driver, Baywatch, John Wick 2, The Accountant, and Atomic Blond). 51:50 — Tease for next week's show and our NEW outro tag line!

We have a very chill show for your Memorial Day weekend! Top of the show: Nick is excited about the 40th anniversary of Star Wars, Matt reserves his nerding out for The Princess Bride. 7:00 — All James Bond movies should have the same title (except Moonraker); Roger Moore’s death & our favorite 007s. 14:00 — Do not tie your superhero to a historical event. 16:00 — how Greg Gianforte’s choke-slam led Ben Jacobs to trailblaze a new path in self-own reporting. 23:00 — quietly stressing about the semi-political discussion, Matt desperately changes the subject without a segue. 24:00 — Perfect Memorial Days and floating kegs. 27:50 — BEGIN DAD TALK PORTION OF THE SHOW: Having a second kid is like almost beating a video game and having to start all over from the beginning. 36:00 — Matt gets ready for a trip to Chicago. 40:00 — Dinosaurs. 42:00 — podcast guest Thomas Stevens 45:00 — Seth Wickersham’s piece on Richard Sherman’s inability to let go of the Super Bowl 49 loss.

The INACTIVES are BACK with an NFL draft recap a mere SIX DAYS after the first round began! Don't mind the rust, folks -- it's part of our charm. 4:30 — Matt remembers to tell listeners the topic of this week's show; Nick is a tee-ball coach 11:30 — This Week in Matt's Crumbling Body 15:00 — Draft talk begins! 17:30 — The Trubisky trade was traaaaaaaash and other draft thoughts 34:45 — Marshawn Lynch to the Raiders 38:30 — GM firings 41:30 — More bang for the Bucs 50:00 — The Seahawks are like Good Will Hunting 54:45 — Spring DRANKS 59:20 — Patch the One-Eyed Horse 1:02:20 — Breakfast sandwich hacks

The Inactives are BACK (for a week) and wasting airtime as egregiously as ever. First 27 minutes: Matt and Nick catch up, reflect on the time-suck of winter, the slow march of time, loneliness, suburbia, and other heartwarming stuff. 28:00 -- Nick's biggest takeaways from free agency so far 32:50 -- Matt on Washington firing Scot McCloughan 36:45 -- What does the general 2017 NFL landscape look like? 40:00 -- Matt hates how great the Pats' moves have been 45:00 -- a nominal acknowledgement of the Seahawks 48:30 -- odds and ends