The Self Control Show with Jason Schnitzer

You don’t mean to shut her down, but every time she brings something up, you feel cornered.Your tone shifts, your body tightens, and before you know it, you’re defending yourself instead of listening.You tell yourself you’re “just explaining,” but that explanation feels like rejection to her.She’s not trying to criticize you—she’s trying to connect with you.In this episode, we unpack:👉 Why you get defensive even when you don’t mean to👉 How it triggers disconnection and resentment👉 The nervous system link between defensiveness and control👉 What it takes to stay calm, grounded, and engaged when it feels uncomfortableYou don’t need to talk more—you need to regulate better.Because when you stop defending, you finally create the safety she’s been asking for.How to work with me ⬇️:✅ BOOK a free discovery call with me here:calendly.com/jasonschnitzercoaching/free-discovery-call-with-jason✅ FOLLOW me on Instagram: @jasonschnitzercoaching

You avoid conflict. You say “yes” when you mean “no.” You think keeping the peace will keep her happy. But the truth is, your silence and people-pleasing are building resentment—not connection. In this episode, we break down why the “nice guy” approach leaves your wife feeling unseen, why it slowly kills attraction, and how honesty—not passivity—is the foundation of emotional safety. You don’t need to be mean. But you do need to be real. 🎯 Ready to stop people-pleasing and start leading with presence? 👉BOOK a free discovery call: calendly.com/jasonschnitzercoaching/free-discovery-call-with-jason 👉FOLLOW me on Instagram: @jasonschnitzercoaching

You’re constantly on. Always chasing. Always grinding. Even at home, you’re still in motion—physically present but never fully there. This episode is for the man who doesn’t know how to slow down without feeling guilty, irritable, or lost. We unpack the deeper reason you can’t stop pushing, how it disconnects you from your family, and why your inability to rest is quietly wrecking your relationships. ✅ You don’t need another productivity hack. ✅ You need to learn how to regulate the part of you that thinks performance is the only way to feel worthy. How to work with me ⬇️: BOOK a free discovery call with me here: calendly.com/jasonschnitzercoaching/free-discovery-call-with-jason FOLLOW me on Instagram: @jasonschnitzercoaching

You think the problem is her. But the real issue is you haven’t been honest with yourself for years. You’ve stuffed your own needs. You’ve gone silent to avoid conflict. You’ve chased peace instead of growth. And now you resent the very woman you swore you’d protect—because deep down, you’ve abandoned yourself. This episode breaks down: ✅ Why “choosing your battles” isn’t noble, it’s emotional avoidance ✅ How people-pleasing creates tension instead of harmony ✅ What your irritation with her is actually showing you about you You don’t hate your wife. You hate that you’ve been ignoring what you really feel, want, and need—until resentment replaced connection. How to work with me ⬇️: Book a free discovery call with me here: calendly.com/jasonschnitzercoaching/free-discovery-call-with-jason Follow me on Instagram: @jasonschnitzercoaching

Your tone isn’t just how you communicate—it’s how your child learns who they need to be to stay safe with you.In this episode of What Your Tone Is Teaching Them, Jason Schnitzer unpacks how subtle shifts in your voice, tension in your energy, and pressure in your presence can condition your kids to become anxious achievers, emotional caretakers, or lifelong people pleasers.You think you’re correcting them. But what you’re really doing is programming their nervous system to prioritize your mood over their own truth.You’ll learn:✅ Why kids don’t hear your words—they feel your nervous system✅ How your reactions wire their emotional identity and self-worth✅ Why “they only listen when I snap” is a red flag, not a win✅ Practical tools to regulate your tone and teach emotional safety instead of fearThis episode is a call to action for fathers to stop reacting, start regulating, and raise kids who feel safe being their full selves.Book a free discovery call with me here:https://calendly.com/jasonschnitzercoaching/free-discovery-call-with-jasonFollow us on Instagram: @jasonschnitzercoaching

One second you’re calm—the next, you’re snapping. If you keep wondering how you go from steady to explosive in two seconds flat, this episode is for you. We unpack what’s really happening when you lose it, why your nervous system hijacks your reactions, and how it’s impacting your family more than you realize. This isn’t an anger problem—it’s a regulation problem. And it’s fixable.⚡ Want tools to break the 0–100 cycle?👉 Book a free discovery call: https://calendly.com/jasonschnitzercoaching/free-discovery-call-with-jasonFollow us on Instagram: @jasonschnitzercoaching

You think it’s just your words—but it’s your tone your kids are learning from. In this episode, we break down how your voice impacts their nervous system, shapes their sense of safety, and wires them for either connection or fear. From daily tone shifts to developmental imprinting in the early years, this is the wake-up call most dads need. Your tone isn’t harmless—it’s the lesson they’ll carry for life. 🎯 Ready to learn how to stay calm under pressure? 👉 Book a free discovery call: https://calendly.com/jasonschnitzercoaching/free-discovery-call-with-jason

Why is it that you can stay composed during a stressful meeting—but lose it the second you walk through your front door? In this episode, I unpack the emotional whiplash so many high-performing men experience: dialed-in at work, reactive at home. We’ll break down why home feels harder, how nervous system fatigue drains your capacity to stay regulated, and the hidden reason your tone changes the minute you see your kids or wife. Most men try to go from performance mode to presence mode with zero buffer—and it backfires. I’ll walk you through practical, real-world transition rituals that help you downshift so you can lead your family with the same grounded presence you bring to your career. And if you’ve ever thought, “I should know better by now,” this episode will remind you that regulation is a skill—and you can learn it. 🔗 Ready to stop snapping and start showing up as the man your family needs? Book a free discovery call with me here: https://calendly.com/jasonschnitzercoaching/free-discovery-call-with-jason

Book a call to Learn more about working 1 : 1 with me https://calendly.com/jasonschnitzercoaching/free-discovery-call-with-jason Check out my website https://www.jasonschnitzercoaching.com/ Having an illustrious career as a former model and TV personality in the realms of motocross and MMA, Mercedes has long worked in the world of men and knows how to connect with a male audience. With a massive following of over 5 million, she’s turned her social media platforms into unconventional safe spaces for men to process their deepest fears, sexual desires, and insecurities. Dubbed, the “Trojan Horse of OnlyFans,” Mercedes spent years offering men an anonymous way to access her coaching in order to conquer even the most sensitive issues. She’s drawn on the insights from these intimate conversations along with her own decade-long healing journey through sex addiction and toxic relationship patterns. Her unique philosophy integrates personal growth, sexuality, and relationship skills to help men end their over-thinking, and confidently create meaningful, loving, and healthy relationships. On this episode we discuss the "Nice Guy" syndrome and relationships. What it is and how to start going about changing and lots of other fun topics! Find Mercedes on instagram @mercedesterrell If you want to learn more about how to build self control & regulate your nervous system to create a happy marriage book a call with me here —> https://calendly.com/jasonschnitzercoaching/free-discovery-call-with-jason Enjoy! - Jason

Brendan is a Ph.D. researcher, teacher, consultant, and speaker, specializing in the socio-emotional development and well-being of boys and men. In this podcast, we talk about how society and culture have impacted boys and men with regard to emotions and how they experience them. There are lots of people discussing what masculinity is and isn't, Brendan and I talk all about it and more! Find Brendan on Instagram @re.masculine

On this week's episode, I have my coaching friend and fellow 10th Planet Jiu Jitsu Brown Belt Colin Carr on to talk about "Shadow Work". Shadowwork is a phrase coined by psychologist Carl Jung. It is a type of psychotherapy that involves exploring and uncovering parts of ourselves that we've repressed or ignored. We talk about his journey, how he came to this work, & tools, ideas, & tactics to start doing this work yourself. You can find Colin on Instagram @colincarrcoaching Enjoy! If you want to learn more about how to build self control & regulate your nervous system to create a happy marriage book a call with me here —> https://calendly.com/jasonschnitzercoaching/free-discovery-call-with-jason

In this week's episode, I have my friend & Coach Roxanne on who works with & coaches high-performing women to become their own "parts guru". If you've been checking off all the boxes in your life but still don't seem to feel good about where you're at then this is the episode for you. We talk about parts work and how it has impacted our lives & the lives of our clients, what is a part & how to start working with yours, & much much more! You can find Roxanne on Instagram @roxannekennedygranata Enjoy! 
 If you want to learn more about how to build self control & regulate your nervous system to create a happy marriage book a call with me here —> https://calendly.com/jasonschnitzercoaching/free-discovery-call-with-jason

Book a call to Learn more about working 1 : 1 with me https://calendly.com/jasonschnitzercoaching/free-discovery-call-with-jason Check out my website https://www.jasonschnitzercoaching.com/ 
 Episode 40 of the Self Control Show! Reclaim Your Nervous System w/ Mastin Kipp! On this episode I’m honored to have my mentor, @mastinkipp , to talk about his new book, “Reclaim Your Nervous System.” (Endorsed by Dr. Stephen Porges himself) & much much more. This episode has been highly anticipated for me personally because of the significance Mastin has had on my own journey as a man, husband, father, & coach. Mastin has over 20,000 hours of working with clients, he’s a thought leader in the coaching industry, & is the Co-Founder/creator of the @instituteforfxcoach where I proudly call home for all of my training. We talk about the book and its desired impact on the world, the coaching industry, lots of great insights on living your life to its fullest, and how people can use ambition as fuel for their healing journey beyond anything you ever thought could be possible for you! If you want to learn more about coaching with Mastin check him out @mastinkipp for the highest level coaching & training the industry has to offer! Enjoy, - Jason 


Book a call to Learn more about working 1 : 1 with me https://calendly.com/jasonschnitzercoaching/free-discovery-call-with-jason Check out my website https://www.jasonschnitzercoaching.com/ In this episode, I have special guest Relationship Coach Diana Prime with me to talk about polarity in a relationship aka Masculine & Feminine Energies. Polarity is a buzz topic in relationships lately, and we break it down to discuss how it might be impacting your current relationship or marriage. Diana has an awesome Instagram account with tons of great quick videos that are very relatable, digestible, & actionable! Check her out @dianaprimecoaching. Enjoy! - Jason

Book a call to Learn more about working 1 : 1 with me https://calendly.com/jasonschnitzercoaching/free-discovery-call-with-jason Check out my website https://www.jasonschnitzercoaching.com/ In this episode, I have a special guest Simran Mayadas. She is a licensed therapist who specializes in Internal Family Systems (IFS) and Somatic Experiencing (SE) with neurobiology and cognitive therapies. She's been training jiu-jitsu for 10 years and is a Purple Belt. We nerd out on how Jiu Jitsu can be a healing martial art with regards to trauma, anxiety, depression, & a powerful tool that can drastically change your life in all aspects. You can find Simran on instagram @mayasim74_ (she's a great follow!) or check out her website www.integratepsychotherapy.com !!

Book a call to Learn more about working 1 : 1 with me https://calendly.com/jasonschnitzercoaching/free-discovery-call-with-jason Check out my website https://www.jasonschnitzercoaching.com/ In this episode, I have special guest Coach Danny Kenduck who specializes in social anxiety & people pleasing. We talk all things anxiety: Why it's there in there in the first place, how to recognize if you have anxiety and don't know it, and practical tools to start to navigate to feeling back in control of your life.

Book a call to Learn more about working 1 : 1 with me https://calendly.com/jasonschnitzercoaching/free-discovery-call-with-jason Check out my website https://www.jasonschnitzercoaching.com/ On this episode, I'm joined with Special Guest Coach Jane Ysadora who specializes in helping people clear their money blocks and heal their relationship with money. We talked about common ways she sees people get stuck and how to know if you're blocking yourself from creating wealth and abundance in your life.

Book a call to Learn more about working 1 : 1 with me https://calendly.com/jasonschnitzercoaching/free-discovery-call-with-jason check out my website https://www.jasonschnitzercoaching.com/ In this episode, I talk about one of the most prevalent missteps in the coaching space. That's mindset coaching. Why mindset work without understanding self-control is keeping you stuck.

Book a call to Learn more about working 1 : 1 with me https://calendly.com/jasonschnitzercoaching/free-discovery-call-with-jason check out my website https://www.jasonschnitzercoaching.com/ Healthy conflict is key in any long-term relationship. In this episode, I talk about the importance of learning how to have healthy conflict as well as where a lot of couples go wrong & how to change that.

Learn more at https://www.jasonschnitzercoaching.com/Follow us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jasonschnitzercoaching/ Special Guest Elise Micheals: Elise Micheals is a trauma-informed men’s coach who helps men find purpose and passion again by healing subconscious trauma. Over the last four years, she has accumulated over seven hundred thousand followers. She has mastered the art of breaking down difficult psychological concepts into 20-second sound bites that help men acknowledge and understand parts of themselves they haven’t before. Currently Elise serves men via her BetterMan Membership,and high-profile clients via 1.1 Instagram > https://www.instagram.com/elisemicheals_/ Tiktok > https://www.tiktok.com/@elisemicheals?lang=en Youtube > https://www.youtube.com/@EliseMicheals Linkedin > https://www.linkedin.com/in/elise-micheals/ Website > www.Elisemicheals.com Facebook> https://www.facebook.com/TheEliseMicheals/