Thot Police

play ball! the thot police are the thot refs as we tackle (lol) the topic of sports. everything from player safety to painkiller addiction to contracts and racism. mostly it’s about football since christina wasn’t here. enjoy!

it’s an all thot takeover this week as the ladies gear up to cover women in politics! we got an estimated 422 female politicians running for house seats in the upcoming midterms and that means we got an estimated 4 ladies talking about gender, race, and pop culture! Elena from scienceFM is our guest this week and Elsie is back too! we cover primaries, the reshaping of American meme culture, and what nickname Elsie’s Filipino mother called her for 19 years. it’s a good one. Girl Scouts honor. ????????

after briefly changing to the YKS/mic dicta release schedule (sorry) the police are back and this time there in a freakin boat with @KrangTNelson. we’re all here to talk about the summer blockbuster, or should i say boatbuster, THE MEG. you know what that means: a lot of mama mia 2 discourse. so kick back, relax, slip in those ear buds (or ear boats) and enjoy. i ran out of boat jokes. donate to Shark Savers here: http://www.sharksavers.org/en/home/ and the Natural Resources Defense Council: https://www.nrdc.org/

gavel! gavel! order in da court! we’re back with @floozyesq fresh out the damn bar exam and we’re talkin laws. meggie is super fucked up on pills cuz she messed up her back like an old ass man and i’m stone cold sober for a change of pace. hell yea

acab except for us baby! rory, meggie, elsie, and me are talking about the most freaking epic bacon for the win union buster ever! elon musk baby.. that good pickle rick shit! sorry pedo guy, you really did ask for it.

rory’s back from a country and i’m drunk yet again. christina’s here too. we talk about his trip and the news he missed (thai boys, lebron signing, probably some more basketball too, i’m a professional sportswriter now). rory brought some doritos back that we had to guess the flavor of and i won because i know flavor. c’mon

colin fagan is back on the show to talk to us mostly about an open mic that he doesn’t host or have any association with other than he goes to it sometimes. we also talk about bill clinton being a big piece of shot and hypothesize about a scenario involving bill clinton and too many big pieces of shit. have fun!

today on the show we’ve got one of the boys from twitter named connor, connor mcspadden from the mean boys podcast who was in town to record a standup set for trutv. we just riffed and i forget what we talked about other mcspadden roasted me and i think he was playing fortnite while we recorded. my skill at writing these has gotten worse over time because i have lost the ability to communicate in anything over 280 characters and i will never apologize. listen to Mean Boys at http://meanboyspodcast.com

hey gang! today we drank a bunch of kirkland signature champagne talked with andrea jablonski and mackenzie harding from the talk of shame podcast on the one year anniversary of their first episode being released! we also had a special appearance from @swearsayer to censor my email address! i’m gonna start writing these after we record because i keep forgetting what we talked about. not the next two though, we recorded them weeks ago. sorry. listen to Talk of Shame here: https://m.soundcloud.com/talkofshame

woop-woop, that’s the sound of da police! the thot police that is! your old pals connor, meggie, and rory are back in the studio with special guest olga in from the big apple, los angeles. our buddy jeff also drops in on this episode as we talk about california’s goofy ass primary system. “but wait, the california primaries were a week ago!” yeah, that’s when we recorded it you dumbass. but don’t worry, we cover much more: everything from rellik the clown to yelawolf to the word “pimp” unless rory cut that part out because i accidentally said something racist, he certainly didn't cut the mics bumping into shit. also i said the r-word but in the context of it’s wild that a school had it in their name so it’s okay and you’re not allowed to get mad at me. follow olga on twitter @runolgarun

the original hoes are back with special guest and mine and rory’s new roommate mic dicta's christina! we did a power hour and talked about roseanne, pusha t vs drake, kanye’s new album, bryan colangelo’s twitter accounts, and probably more. i don’t remember the second half but i’m sure the whole thing is good. follow christina on twitter @floozyesq and listen to mic dicta, bye!

we’re here with jake flores talkin about ICE, elon musk, sam hyde, and more. i’m drunk and watching the go off kings and i’m rushing the description so just listen. see jake on tour, i saw him last night and he ruled Jake Flores tour dates with Mishka Shubaly: 5/25 Okawville, IL - House Show (message for invite) 5/26 Kansas City, KS - Barrel of the Bottoms 5/27 Hutchinson, KS - The Dirty Leprachaun 5/28 Denver, CO - Walnut Room 5/29 Ft Collins, CO - R Bar 5/30 Denver, CO - Jagged Mt Brewery 5/31 Denver, CO - Colorado Room 6/2 Denver, CO - Rebel Yell https://twitter.com/feraljokes/status/995419505626054656

today it’s just the founding members of hoe county and we’re here to talk about the people in that shitty bari weiss article. the intellectual dark web one, idk if she’s put anything out since then. we cover the big guns: jordan peterson, ben shapiro, sam harris, christina sommers and some other ones that i can’t remember off the top of my head on account of we recorded a week ago and i forgot to write an episode description until now. sorry. anyways if we sound mad we aren’t, we were actually laughing. this is all very funny to us. later! https://twitter.com/CONNORisSWEET/status/986377395904147457

this episode is short for a MEDICAL EMERGENCY!! my hearts all fucked up so i wasn’t allowed to take pills or drink coffee so i was very low energy and tired and meggie and rory were tired in solidarity. rory didnt even edit the episode well. we talked about a bunch of bullshit, if you complain to me you’re being ableist. bye!

this week the ladies are out of town and the boys are down to clown! that’s right folks, meggie is in washington dc (district of columbia) trying to drain the swamp so it’s just connor, rory, and our guest colin fagan. what started out as just us riffing turned into a discussion about incels, which we aren’t so don’t say we are. we fuck lots and we’re good at it. sorry if you hear me shout at all, we were watching game two of the sixers celtics series. also i’m writing this before rory finished editing the episode because the internet at my office is down so i can’t do any work and i’m bored. i also drew a picture of bart simpson. enjoy the episode! here’s a link to the bart simpson picture btw https://twitter.com/connorissweet/status/992479733895090179?s=21

*CONNOR CRIES IN THIS AND DOESN’T WANT YOU TO TALK TO HIM ABOUT IT* hey gang! connor’s dad is in the studio to drop a fire ass track about catholicism. who prayed on who? is jesus daddy af? did connor suck his dad’s dick or vice versa? meggie’s a witch. get into it, pimp

comedian elsie how joins us to talk about the movie trolls, connor is very hungover on the toilet right now and can’t think of anything else to say

we deep dive into connor’s fool halfwit life asking hard hitting questions like “do you have feelings” and "can you confirm you're more man than machine" as a bonus we left in all his burps and can opens so you too can know this heaven also meggie went to wrestlemania jeez calm down watch connor eat a dime here https://twitter.com/meggie_gates/status/984585034026889219 *connor knows he said "walter payton" when he meant "donovan mcnabb" don't @ him

today the thot police are joined by one of our favorite twitter accounts @victoriaxxviii to talk about the Black Panther for gamers, Ready Player One. we cover it all, baby: ernest cline’s horny poetry, all the good parts of the movie connor missed because he can’t do anything without drinking, and whether the book is worse than the movie (victoria and meggie read it, rory was too busy playing kingdom hearts and connor doesn’t know how to read). plus, rory doesn’t know the difference between “dysphoria” and “dysmorphia” and everyone else was too nice to correct him even though we definitely do know the difference! check out victoria’s piece about Ready Player One here: https://medium.com/@victoriaxxviii/the-definitive-list-of-reasons-why-ready-player-one-was-so-bad-4359f02a3bf

today meggie and connor are joined by comedian merrit landsteiner to do some commentary for the movie blue valentine. This thing has everything you could ask for: rory and connor’s roommate josh coming in the room and saying stuff off mic, merrit and meggie making connor uncomfortable by asking him about love, connor very unprofessionally pausing the movie halfway through to go smoke a cigarette, and more! are we able to add some humor to one of the saddest movies in recent memory? not my problem, its already recorded. follow @merritlands on twitter for details about merrit’s kick ass live shows