TRIBE

#85: The Final Episode by Practical Tips for Day to Day Happiness with Annika Erickson-Pearson

You can actually help the world. In a very real way. A few months ago, I was re-reading one of my favorite books, A Return to Love, when a line stood out to me. She wrote, "Angry people cannot create a more peaceful world." Angry people cannot create a more peaceful world. And let's pause for a second here. Anger is often rooted in oppression, and I am writing from a place of immense privilege. So, my white and straight and economically-advantaged and able-bodied friends, this one is for y'all.  If you want to create a more peaceful world, it starts by doing the work on yourself. This is work like: Clearing judgments of yourself and the people around you. If you are judging them, you do not have time to love them. Removing your self-doubt and laying a foundation for self-respect so that you can move into the world and actually do things. Filling your own cup so that you can turn around and be sincerely generous with the world around you. Yeah. Do those things. That's a part of your contribution to world peace.  And we all know that I have many podcasts over the past three years that go into a lot of depth and detail on those topics. So, dig them up, and show up. The world needs you to be your best you.  Sound good? Ready, break. mailing list: eepurl.com/bEOU5z website: http://annikaep.com/ twitter: twitter.com/annikaep instagram: www.instagram.com/annikaep/

What job should you take? In my experience as a millennial (and in particular, a white, middle-class millennial with a lot of privilege), I've heard a lot of messages about how I deserve to be paid to follow my passion.  We live in a time of the startup, of the hustle, of the grind. And we also live in a time where we (millennials) will change jobs 7+ times over the course of a career. Are we hustling and grinding and changing it up in search of the perfect job? Should we be paid to follow our passion? In this week's podcast, I explore this question and share some stories about what it really felt like for me to be paid to follow my passion full-time. I'm not trying to make a prescription for you, but rather offer a different way of thinking about what we want and need out of a job.  So dig in. Forward to someone who needs some perspective. mailing list: eepurl.com/bEOU5z website: http://annikaep.com/ twitter: twitter.com/annikaep instagram: www.instagram.com/annikaep/

Meditation is important. I think most of us have heard that message at some point in our lives. Some days it seems like half the articles I read about ~successful people~ include a nod to their meditation practice. My teachers not only cite meditation as important, but as one of the transformational tools that allowed them to live a deeper, fuller, more vibrant life. So we get the point: meditation is important. But how do you do it? Well. I don't have a lot of answers. For one, meditation is an important part of many traditions and cultures, and I am neither a scholar nor a spiritual leader. I have no interest in claiming to teach the world to meditate. What I can share is my own experiences with meditation. I've tried many different kinds... guided, spiritual, musical, walking. You name it, I've tried it. And for a year, nothing really connected. In this week's podcast, I walk you through my path of finding the meditation practice that works for me. I also discuss my thoughts on what meditation is and what it isn't, particularly in my own life. The key? If you want to find a meditation practice that works for you, you must... meditate. You won't learn French if you just read textbooks about the theory of the language. You must speak it. Similarly, you must try to meditate. (Links on my website.) mailing list: eepurl.com/bEOU5z website: http://annikaep.com/ twitter: twitter.com/annikaep instagram: www.instagram.com/annikaep/

I arise in the morning torn between a desire to improve the world and a desire to enjoy the world. This makes it hard to plan the day. E. B. White Same. To achieve or to enjoy? To work or to play? To create or to savor? And right, I hear you "but my work is play!" people. Sometimes work is work. And sometimes we just have to go out dancing, or play in the park. How do we decide which to do? Do we have to pick sides? Well... I like to think of the achievement v. enjoyment paradox more like a polarity. It's not a problem we solve, but rather a relationship we manage over time. We can set up our lives to better listen to ourselves so we know when to be in achiever mode, and when to be in enjoyment mode. And that's what we discuss on the podcast this week. Listen now. [As I mentioned in the podcast, I made a list of all of my 2018 New Year's resolutions. (here: http://annikaep.com/blog/new-years-resolutions/) And then my coach had me group them into "buckets" -- creation & expression, intellect & learning, beauty, etc. The buckets help me understand which direction to steer my ship, particularly when I start to sense that something feels off in my life. I look at the list, figure out a bucket I may be neglecting, and try something over there. If you want to try this method, I recommend first getting yourself nice and inspired and making a list that makes you happy and excited. Move randomly, quickly. Then, and only then, review your list and see if you can break things down into buckets. If you started with buckets, you might have limited yourself.] mailing list: eepurl.com/bEOU5z website: http://annikaep.com/ twitter: twitter.com/annikaep instagram: www.instagram.com/annikaep/

This podcast wouldn't exist. If I let the answer to the question, "but what will they think?" govern my life, this podcast wouldn't exist.  A few years ago, it came to me that it was probably time for me to start sharing all of the things I'd been learning over the years about spirituality and personal growth. But I also had an image of myself as "intellectual" and "ambitious," and was terrified that the people around me would look down on me for doing something so "soft" or "woo-woo."  I was paralyzed by the fear of their judgment. Sound familiar to anyone? It wasn't until I finally came out with it, and started doing all of this (in a very public way, I might add), that the ideas started flowing to me and I found my groove. In short, I had to first get into the water to learn how to swim.  So this week's episode is about validation. Why is craving the validation of people around you bad for your life? Well, for starters, it dulls your creative problem-solving capacity. If you are constantly seeking to fit into the box that other people have made for you, you are probably going to make some very boring stuff. Sometimes it takes moving to France, away from the people and life you know to become the best version of your artistic self.  Second, nothing anyone says will ever fill the void. If someone approves of you, or gives you a compliment, it's going to feel so good... for 4 hours until you start craving it and need another hit. Validation is a drug. It's a bottomless pit that will never actually satisfy you. Two important things: 1. This conversation sits on privilege. Women, people of color, LGBT individuals, immigrants, persons with disabilities, etc. do not always have the privilege of marching to the beat of their own drummer. We discuss this at length in the podcast. 2. So you listened to the podcast and now want to learn how to seek validation within? Great. Listen to this episode on self-worth and enoughness (http://annikaep.com/blog/self-worth-and-enoughness/). And then listen to this one called you're already at the party, now what? (http://annikaep.com/blog/the-inner-work-youre-already-at-the-party-now-what/) mailing list: eepurl.com/bEOU5z website: http://annikaep.com/ twitter: twitter.com/annikaep instagram: www.instagram.com/annikaep/

Have you ever felt that insane I-miss-you-all-the-time-and-can't-stop-thinking-about-you feeling? Yeah, me too. When you first start seeing someone you really like, it's like you temporarily lose your mind every time they take more than 5 minutes to text you back. You want to be around them all the time. You feel more powerful, and the world becomes a less-terrifying version of itself.  You love this person, right? That's what that is... right?  Um. Well, not really.  Okay but what about that feeling when someone becomes a part of your story? You've been around one another for long enough to have learned the quirks and intricacies of your personalities. You are companions through life, sharing space and time together. Now, that's love... right? Again, not quite.  We have a problem in American English. We use the word love to describe too many things. We love coffee, and we love our partners. We love Queer Eye, and we love our families. And then we get confused, watching movies where that "I'm on drugs because we're together!!!!" feeling is love. And then we talk to older couples who say that long-term companionship is love. Of course we are confused. We are overloaded. So how do we know what the right definition of love is? I happen to believe that there is no black/white concept. I might subscribe to one idea, and you may to another. The important thing is that we are clear for ourselves and can communicate to the people around us what we believe in. So today's episode is an exploration in expanding the lexicon of love.  I talk about the psychology of falling in love, a concept called cathexis, and offer an interpretation of what love is, based on the teachings of M. Scott Peck. The whole idea is to get you thinking about these things in a new way, so you can come out of your internal-hurt-bubble-of-fear, and move with courage and compassion in your relationships. mailing list: eepurl.com/bEOU5z website: http://annikaep.com/ twitter: twitter.com/annikaep instagram: www.instagram.com/annikaep/

It's my two-year podcast anniversary. And what a year it's been. First, I find it hard to convey the full weight of my gratitude to each of you. For your support, for your attention, for your commitment to yourselves and to this world. It's an honor to get to show up here and participate in the growth and enlightenment of the world. Thank you. Thank you. This past year has been more defined by anger, resentment, and hurt than I'd like to admit. So many weeks have come and gone with no podcast episode because I truly did not have anything good to say. I have a hunch that our political climate, where up is down and down is up and tweets are now policy, has something very real to do with it. But we can't just all become more timid, insecure, and cynical versions of ourselves. We've got to show up for the thing we believe in: hope. And so this week's podcast is a call for hope. And action. We've got to remember that we are here. Living. On this planet. Now. This is a gift. The gift is the opportunity we all have each day to actually be, live into, and create the kinder, more intelligent, more thoughtful, more forgiving world that we crave. This year's podcast moved away from its previous focus on witnessing our inner lives to recognizing and stepping to the responsibility we all have to participate in life. "When you feel helpless, help someone." We have the choice, chance, gift to wake up every morning and remember what we believe in. And to protect ourselves and our capacity. And then to go out into the world and give. The world needs us. We need us. And giving helps. I hope that in one year from now when we gather again and look back on what we've done, we can say that we made a ruckus. We failed, we triumphed. We made things a little better. But there is no doubt that we went out and did the damn thing. In partnership, doing the damn thing, Annika

It's my two-year podcast anniversary. And what a year it's been.  First, I find it hard to convey the full weight of my gratitude to each of you. For your support, for your attention, for your commitment to yourselves and to this world. It's an honor to get to show up here and participate in the growth and enlightenment of the world. Thank you. Thank you. This past year has been more defined by anger, resentment, and hurt than I'd like to admit. So many weeks have come and gone with no podcast episode because I truly did not have anything good to say.  I have a hunch that our political climate, where up is down and down is up and tweets are now policy, has something very real to do with it. But we can't just all become more timid, insecure, and cynical versions of ourselves. We've got to show up for the thing we believe in: hope.  And so this week's podcast is a call for hope. And action. We've got to remember that we are here. Living. On this planet. Now. This is a gift. The gift is the opportunity we all have each day to actually be, live into, and create the kinder, more intelligent, more thoughtful, more forgiving world that we crave.  This year's podcast moved away from its previous focus on witnessing our inner lives to recognizing and stepping to the responsibility we all have to participate in life. "When you feel helpless, help someone."  We have the choice, chance, gift to wake up every morning and remember what we believe in. And to protect ourselves and our capacity. And then to go out into the world and give. The world needs us. We need us. And giving helps. I hope that in one year from now when we gather again and look back on what we've done, we can say that we made a ruckus. We failed, we triumphed. We made things a little better. But there is no doubt that we went out and did the damn thing.  In partnership, doing the damn thing, Annika

You are not crazy. Your feelings are facts. And oppression is real.  This week's podcast is for every time your coworker said something offensive to you, and you thought you were being too sensitive. You are not crazy.  This week's podcast is for every date you've been on and came home feeling gross and misused. You are not crazy. This week's podcast is for every conversation you've had with someone who took your power away from you. You are not crazy. And this week's podcast is for every time you looked at the system and realized it was not set up to protect you. You are not crazy. Your feelings are facts. Your story is yours. And this system is set up to make you feel crazy for it.  -- "I never talked about these things publicly because, as a woman, it has always felt like I may as well have been talking about the weather. Stories like these have never been taken seriously. Women are shamed, told they are uptight, nasty, bitter, can’t take a joke, are too sensitive." Molly Ringwald --  You are not uptight. You are not nasty. You are not bitter. You are not too sensitive. And you are not crazy.  This week's podcast is on what to do next. Listen. Share. Stand up.

My parents are great. It would be somewhat conceited to say they did a great job raising me (because the end product is, well, me)... but honestly, I think they did. What does this have to do with anything? This week on my podcast, I share the story of my spirituality. Starting from the environment of inquiry, openness and deep belief and faith partnered with questions and doubt, cultivated by my parents. They also demonstrated what it looks like to believe something and then act it out in the world. To give legs to your convictions. To walk your talk. So with that foundation, my relationship to religion and spirit and belief has grown and stumbled and transformed over the years.  The full story is here. I know that spirituality is a bit of a buzz word these days, and it's hard to know where to start. It seems like for some, spirituality means meditating, or having crazy acid trips, or buying crystals.... and you might not get the point. (Just like to some, Christianity seems like singing hymns, or reading the Bible, or telling people what they are and are not allowed to do... and you might not get the point.) I get it. That's controversial. But there are people who do all kinds of things in the names of all kinds of traditions, and I want you to understand that you get to make your own choices. You get to make your own interpretations. You get to choose your own path.  So what do you do? 1) You start by wanting to start. You start by deciding to start. Voila. Invisible door of possibilities, opened. Information, ideas, people will start coming to you now. 2) And then you take what resonates with you, and leave the rest. What makes sense, makes your heart soar, makes you feel like a part of something beautiful, might seem meaningless to someone else. In the same way, something with no meaning to you could be someone else's world. 3) Finally, you give it legs. You take what you learn and you go out into the world and let it shape your life. You don't keep in books, or yoga classes, or only think about it on Sundays. You become it.  So go forth. Ask questions. Have doubts. Believe in something more. And let it help you help this world. We need it.

You have more control than you think. Yep. It's the truth. Over the big things. Over the little things. Over your own energy and thoughts. You have more control than you think. It's something called discernment. And it means that you get to choose. How did you make your last big decision? Was it someone else's expectation of you? Was it your own expectation of you? Was it constrained by other things? Or was it your own free will? What about the clothes you put on today? Did someone else buy them or give them to you? Did you see them in a picture and want them? Did an external factor figure in your decision-making process? Or was it your own free will? And how about your mood right now? Are you reacting to the way someone treated you earlier? Or to a news article you just read? Are you future-tripping about what the rest of the week is going to be like? Or did you choose your mood? We have so much more control than we think we do. We can choose so much. Learn more on this week's podcast.

Anyone else get tired of pursuing 'personal growth'? Just me? No?  A few months ago, I got real freakin' tired of listening to podcasts telling me how to improve my life. And of buying all of the books of life-hacking tips. And of the journal prompts. (Omg, the journal prompts. So many journal prompts.) I was doing the actions, following the steps, repeating the mantras, and it all felt so hollow. Sometimes personal growth isn't enough. But then what do you do? -- Enter spirituality.  If personal growth is a set of tips, tricks, thoughts, and things... think of spirituality as a way of being in the world. Or a way of zooming out and seeing the whole picture.  Before I lose you, let me make the case for why spirituality matters: 1) Because being a person is hard sometimes, and spirituality reminds us that the motion of the universe is forward. Don't get it? Watch this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JT09JbaEh_I 2) Because part of the human experience is feeling meaninglessness, and spirituality helps provide a foundation beneath our feet.  3) Because sometimes the personal growth tools don't work, and the basic spiritual act of having faith in the impossible is the only way through. I'm not making a case for converting to a religion, or buying a sh*t ton of incense. I'm making a case for leaning into the belief that we are a part of something bigger than us. Something mysterious, brilliant, and benevolent. Today's podcast is all about what matters when personal growth stops working.

Have you ever worked towards excellence? Last week's podcast reminded us that we are already at the party. There's nothing we can do (no striving, pushing, winning) that will ever make us more worthy than we inherently are. And of course, there's no failure that can touch our worth as humans either.  So now what?  Excellence. What we can be, we must be.  Now, now that we know who we are, now is the time to do bold things. When you do new things, you brain is awake and activated and you are more acutely aware of the experience of being alive. And the flip side of this equation is mastery. Once we do the bold thing, once we step out into the world... we get to mastery. Let’s get beyond the "Will I or won’t I show up?" question and ask a new one: How will I master my craft? mailing list: eepurl.com/bEOU5z website: http://annikaep.com/ twitter: twitter.com/annikaep instagram: www.instagram.com/annikaep/

TODAY. Today, I am trying to figure out how to articulate what this podcast episode is about, and how to share a small nugget of wisdom on your browser... and I am struggling.  Some things: 1) This is my favorite podcast that I've ever recorded. Maybe it's just an internal epiphany for me, but like... I LOVED RECORDING THIS. 2) I think it's my favorite because it feels like the greatest nugget of wisdom I have discovered. Ever.  3) Maybe it's the meaning of life. I just turned 25 this weekend, and to me, this lesson is the culmination of everything I've learned in my life. And the real, true, simple secret to the way I live my life with meaning and joy and laughter and intention.  There's really no way to distill it into writing, so you are going to have to take my word for it and listen. It's only 15 minutes long. The SoundCloud version is below, but I am also in the iTunes podcast app.  Know that I love y'all. mailing list: eepurl.com/bEOU5z website: http://annikaep.com/ twitter: twitter.com/annikaep instagram: www.instagram.com/annikaep/

What are you chasing? Has anyone ever asked you that question? Stop. Stop whatever you are doing and think about this for a minute.  What's your goal, and what are you chasing? Are you after happiness? Are you after growth? Are you after wealth? Are you after success? I don't know the answer. You do. And then... what do those things mean? What is happiness? Are you maybe actually chasing all of these at once? Did you give up on chasing all of them and end up on life-autopilot? How are you chasing them? Do you think about them ever? This week's podcast is an invitation to sit down and think about these questions. I model my own answers.  Why? Well. Action without intention is just... boring. Growth happens as a result of intention. This is Part 1 of 4 in a series called "The Inner Work." Consider it an invitation to reflect on what is within you, guiding your life consciously or unconsciously. This week's question session will set you up nicely to move into next week... which is my favorite podcast I've ever recorded. mailing list: eepurl.com/bEOU5z website: http://annikaep.com/ twitter: twitter.com/annikaep instagram: www.instagram.com/annikaep/

There's this belief that so many of us grow up with in America that we have to pick a career. Sure, we're past the days of expecting to go to work at the same phone book company for the next 45 years... but we still live with pressure and expectation to pick something, and make it ours. Forever. That's dangerous and unhelpful. This ethos paralyzes us in inaction. How are you supposed to pick one thing, and then keep doing it? Well.  This week's podcast episode explores the idea of career in relation to Adulting 101. I give my suggestions on how to navigate the world and your own head, and then tie all three Adulting episodes together.  Sneak preview: Stop thinking that you are doing something wrong. You probably are. And you are probably doing something right. But since when is getting everything perfectly right the point of adulting?  We're here to learn and grow, my friends. And I can promise you that that won't happen on your couch with Netflix. Get out there. Make epic mistakes. Be an adult. mailing list: eepurl.com/bEOU5z website: http://annikaep.com/ twitter: twitter.com/annikaep instagram: www.instagram.com/annikaep/

This week's podcast episode is Part 2 of my series on Adulting 101. This series is an exploration on some topics that we must navigate as newly minted "adults," but are not often given direction on. *yay society* And it's impossible to talk about adulting without talking about money. In a very real sense, money is how people, groups, and identities consolidate and hoard power in today's society. Financial education is not equally accessible, but often built into the lives of the already-wealthy. I'm all for disrupting the f*ck out of that and sharing power.  So this week's podcast dives into: 1) Emotional issues around money. Our sense of value/worth, our desire for control, and (you guessed it) our childhoods all factor into our behavior around money.  2) Practical advice about money. The key here is to bring awareness into your financial life, but there are so many small tricks and tools to help you build wealth and abundance. Once again, I'm not an expert. (Shock!) But what I can do is teach from my own experiences and stories, so take what resonates and leave the rest, my friends. I am not liable for your finances. Go forth and prosper. mailing list: eepurl.com/bEOU5z website: http://annikaep.com/ twitter: twitter.com/annikaep instagram: www.instagram.com/annikaep/

This week's podcast episode is Part 1 of my series on Adulting 101. This series is an exploration on some topics that we must navigate as newly minted "adults," but are not often given direction on. *yay society*  So here's the deal: We take three things with us from birth to death: our mind, our soul, and our body. No really. Let's think about that for a minute. Your body is one of a few things that will be with you every step (lol) of your entire life. It will always. be. with. you. Are you spending time thinking about it? Are you trying to ignore it? Are you abusing it, intentionally or unintentionally?  I've spent 65 episodes talking about our minds and souls on this podcast. It's high time we spent 30 minutes talking about health. In this episode I talk very candidly about... 1) My self-image journey. Your mess is your message, and I have a big one. 2) Food. How do we figure out what to eat? Everything is bad for you and we're going to die anyway, right? (Bonus: why cheese is so delicious.) 3) Hallucinating during a kundalini yoga class. 4) And much, much more.  This is the podcast for you if you've ever struggled with self-image, food, eating, exercise, nutrition, etc. Let's open pandora's box and talk about it. Note: I'm not a doctor. I'm not a nutritionist. I'm a 24-year-old sharing a story. This is not medical advice.  And with that fun disclaimer, mailing list: eepurl.com/bEOU5z website: http://annikaep.com/ twitter: twitter.com/annikaep instagram: www.instagram.com/annikaep/

Inspired by my Alaskan vacation, I talked about what it means to reset and shared some ideas about what that could look like. Important notes: 1) Before you do anything else, even if you do nothing else, chill. Turn all the social media and emails and texts off for a few days and just CHILL. Watch baking shows, read books, go for walks. Have no agenda. Just be a person. This is the most important thing. 2) Then, and only if you are truly feeling ~chill~, you can start to take a lil' life inventory. What's up? How are we feeling? Maybe listen to some inspiring podcasts (Tribe (duh), Rich Roll, Rob Bell, On Being) to get yourself started. Be the non-judgmental witness of what's happening around you. 3) Then, FROM A PLACE OF CHILL... the rest is a surprise. And you're going to have to listen to the podcast to know what comes next.  And just like that, we're back. We're rolling. See you next week. mailing list: eepurl.com/bEOU5z website: http://annikaep.com/ twitter: twitter.com/annikaep instagram: www.instagram.com/annikaep/